Art Mann Presents...

Episode Number: 320

Episode Title: The Viewer Mail Special

Description: This is the episode that the viewers demanded. Questions will be answered, requests will be granted, and fun will be had.

Transcript:

I DON'T WANT TO KNOW ABOUT IT BECAUSE I DON'T WANT TO HEAR ABOUT IT YOU GOT ME (SCREAMS) TO MAKE THESE BOOBS LOOK REALLY BIG BECAUSE THEY'RE ACTUALLY KIND OF SMALL I'VE GOT MY SOCKS IN HERE -YOU DO NOT NO, NO I DO I CAN GET IN BIG TROUBLE BUT LOOK WHOLLY CRAP! IN KENYA IN AFRICA THEY USED TO DO (LAUGHS) I WAS TOLD THAT THIS WAS THE PARTY OF THE ENTIRE YEAR FOR AUSTIN I THINK IT IS, YES

(THEME MUSIC STARTS)

HOW YOU DOING? WELCOME TO THE SHOW IT'S OUR VIEWER MAIL SPECIAL TONIGHT WE'RE GOING TO ANSWER SOME QUESTINOS, WE'RE GOING TO SHOW YOU SOME CLIPS AND SO FORTH THAT YOU GUYS REQUESTED AND HAVE A LITTLE FUN HERE IN OUR EXPENSIVE SOUND STAGE SPENCER'S GARAGE (COUGHS) FIRST, WE GET TONS OF EMAILS, PEOPLE WANT TO KNOW ABOUT THAT THING YOU JUST SAW, THE MUSIC IN OUR OPEN, THEY WANT TO BUY IT, THEY WANT TO KNOW MORE INFORMATION ABOUT IT RIGHT HERE WELL THEY ARE CALLED THE MUSICAL OUTFITS GO TO THEIR WEBSITE, CHECK OUT THEIR MUSIC, BUY IT, TREAT THEM WELL THEY TREAT US WELL OH GOOD, YOU KNOW WHAT THIS IS, THIS IS FROM THE LOVE FEST THIS IS OUR NEXT EMAIL, IT'S FROM SAM IN NEW JERSEY SAM SAYS HEY, WAS THAT GUY FOR REAL IN THE LOVE FEST SHOW I MEAN A 0.4? WHT SAM IS TALKING ABOUT IS WE GAVE THE GUY A BREATHALYZER TEST AND HE REGISTERED A 0.40 THAT MEANS REALLY DRUNK WE DID NOT TAMPER WITH THAT DEVICE IN ANY WAY, WE DON'T HAVE THAT TECHNOLOGY, HERE'S THE ACTUAL CLIP, SOMEWHAT UNEDITED SO YOU CAN SEE LOOK JUST SHOW THIS GUY TAKE A BIG BREATH AND PUSH IN THERE FOR 4 SECONDS 1, 2, 3, 4 WHAT DO WE GOT? WHAT'S THE VERDICT DOC? -IT'S A 0.40 (LAUGHS) TONY IN ST. CHARLES MISSOURI WRITES US HE SAYS HEY, IVE JUST RECENTLY SUBSCRIBED TO HDNet AND YOUR SHOW IS ONE OF MY FAVORITES ON THE CHANNEL KEEP UP THE GOOD WORK, DAN RATHER AND ART MANN ARE THE STARS OF HDNet WELL TONY, THIS IS UH, GOOD TIMING, THERE IS A NEW PROMO I THINK THIS IS A PREMIER RIGHT HERE, WE JUST FINISHED THIS RIGHT? YEAH THIS IS STILL WARM TAKE A LOOK A NEW PROMO OF THE STARS OF HDNet THERE ARE FIELD REPORTS AND THEN THERE ARE FIELD REPORTS, I'M A CHILD OF THE FIELD, A CHILD OF THE ROAD, I LOVE WORKING IN THE FIELD I'M NOT REALLY A JOURNALIST I'M LIKE A GUY THAT SOMEHOW GOT A JOB ON T.V. THE DIFFICULTY IN REPORTING IN THE FIELD OFTEN IS, IT'S SO DIFFICULT TO GET THERE, TO GET TO THE SCENE OF THE ACTION AND YOUR UNDER PRESSURE TO GET SOMETHING ON THE AIR RIGHT AWAY WHO ARE WE KIDDING, I TALK TO DRUNK PEOPLE, OKAY IT'S THE DUMBEST JOB IN THE WORLD I CAN'T EVEN BELIEVE I GET PAID TO DO IT WHAT'S MISSING FROM A LOT OF FIELD REPORTS IN THE PAST SOME OF MY OWN IS THE WHY? ANOTHER GOOD QUESTION IS HOW MUCH HAVE YOU HAD TO DRINK OR WHO'S DRIVING? IS IT THE BOOZE OR THE SHOES IS A QUESTION WE ASK SOMETIMES ON OUR SHOW I'M NOT NECESSARLY A JOURNALIST, I CONSIDER MYSELF SOMETHING ELSE LIKE THE OPPOSITE OF THAT WHATEVER THE OPPOSITE WOULD BE WHAT'S THE OPPOSITE OF JOURNALIST? DOES ANYONE KNOW? WHAT I DO, IT'S THE OPPOSITE

DENNIS SAYS ART MANN, LOVE YOUR SHOW DON'T HAVE A FAVORITE EPISODE ALL ARE GOOD KEEP SHOWING BOOBS, BALLS, AND ASSES DON'T MATTER FAT, SKINNY, OLD, JUST KEEP IT COMING IT'S ON THE WAY DENNIS JUST FOR YOU WE HAVE THAT COMING UP RIGHT? NEXT WEEK NEXT I WANT TO SHOW YOU ANOTHER VIEWER SUGGESTED EPISODE THIS ONE IS ON LAKE OF THE OZARKS HEATHER AND TERRY WROTE US THEY SAID HEY, WE HAVE A BOAT, WE HAVE A CRAZY LAKE COME SEE THEM, WE DID THT IS LAKE OF THE OZARKS OVER HERE HEATHER AND TERRY THAT I'VE BEEN TELLING YOU GUYS ABOUT HOW RAE YOU GUYS DOING? -GREAT NOW TELL THEM WHY YOU SENT US THE EMAIL WHY YOU WANTED US TO COME HERE BECAUSE I THOUGHT IT WAS BETTER THAN HAVASU AND LAKE TRAVIS I LIKE THE CONFIDENCE WHAT MAKES THIS PLACE BETTER? IT'S BIGGER, THE BOATS ARE BIGGER PEOPLE ARE CRAZIER -PEOPLE ARE CRAZIER EVERYWHERE WE TURN THERE IS JUST ANOTHER ROW OF DEBAUCHERY IT'S JUST ROW AFTER ROW HERE SICK LOOK..ANYWHERE YOU LOOK

WHAT'S GOING ON? -PARTY COVE WE'RE GOING WILD LAKE OF THE OZARKS BABY (SCREAMS) WE WANT TO SHOW OUR BOOBS, CAN WE?

HOW DOES THIS MEMO GO OUT WHERE ALL THE CRAZY HOT GIRLS END UP ON THE SAME BOAT? WHAT DO YOU MEAN ALL THE CRAZY HOT GIRLS? THERE'S HOT GIRLS, THERE'S CRAZY WOMEN EVERYWHERE THIS IS YOUR BOAT RIGHT? -YEAH DUDE, DO YOU EVER PINCH YOURSELF? THIS IS AMAZING I MEAN THIS IS LAKE OF THE OZARKS, LOOK AROUND IT'S F# # KING AWESOME OUT HERE WHAT'S GOING ON MAN? I DON'T KNOW MAN PARTY GETTING NAKED GETTIGN DRUNK -ARLO LOOK AT HER RIGHT THERE I'M ALWAYS SAYING I'M A LITTLE WORRIED BECAUE MY MOM WATCHES THIS SHOW, I THINK SHE SHOULD BE WORRIED THAT HER MOM SEES THE SHOW

I LOVE NOT HAVING TAN LINES I CAN TELL, THE WHOLE POINT OF IT IS THIS TYPICAL MISSOURI, IS THIS THE ATTITUDE RIGHT HERE WHERE IT'S JUST LIKE IT'S FREE IT SHOULD BE THE ATTITUDE, NAKEDNES SHOULD BE THE ATTITUDE WHAT ARE YOU DOING THERE, I SEE YOU WITH THE NIPPLE THERE I CAN'T HELP IT, IT'S BEAUTIFUL WHY NOT THIS IS MY GIRLFRIEND THIS ONE'S MINE (SCREAMS)

WHERE IS THAT, I HAVE AN ANGRY ONE I WANT TO GET TO, HERE IT IS YEAH IT'S RIGHT ON TOP HOW CONVENEINT ANGRY EMAIL RIGHT HERE, IT'S FROM CHRIS, LET'S SHOW EVERYONE WHY CHRIS IS ANGRY, I MADE A COMMENT ABOUT CINCINATTI VERY VEGAS WITH THE OUTFITS, THAT'S FANTASTIC YOU CAN'T WEAR THAT IN CINCINATTI CHRIS SAYS, ART, THE HOT WOMEN AT OUR LABOR DAY FIREWORKS IN CINCINATTI BLOW THAT CHICKS OUTFIT OUT OF THE WATER, C'MON DON'T DOWNPLAY THE NATTI UNTIL YOU'VE BEEN TO THE BEST PARTY THERE CHRIS, I'M SORRY, I'M BEING 100% SERIOUS RIGHT NOW I DIDN'T MEAN TO THROW THE NATTI UNDER THE BUS I WOUDLNT INTENTIONALLY DO THAT, ANYONE THAT KNOWS ME THEY KNOW I WOULD NOT DO THAT I MEANT TO SAY COLUMBUS AS YOU WILL NOT SEE THAT OUTFIT IN COLUMBUS NOT IN A MILLION YEARS IT'S TIME FOR ANOTHER VIEWER SUGGESTED EPISODE THIS GUY NAMED MIKE MARTEL WRITES US AND HE SAYS HEY THE FRIDAY AFTER THANKSGIVING THERE IS A PLACE CALLED GLAMIS THAT GOES CRAZY, MOTORIZED DEVICES EVERYWHERE, DRUNK PEOPLE OF COURSE YOU GUYS WOULD LOVE IT, WE WENT AND NOW I'M SHOWING IT TO YOU

WHOLLY CRAP, DUDE DID YOU SEE THAT OH MY GOD! I LOVE THIS MOTORIZED STUFF WHOOO THAT WAS AWESOME WHAT DOES THAT FEEL LIKE? -THAT'S INCREDIBLE IT DOESN'T FEEL LIKE IT'S EVER GOING TO END WHOLLY..AS A PASSENGER WHAT DO YOU THINK? I SH# T MY PANTS (LAUGHS)

WE'VE SEEN A LOT OF CRAZY THINGS ON OUR SHOW BUT WE'VE NEVER SEEN A GOLF CART WITH A STRIPPER POLE YEAH YOU KNOW THAT'S HOW WE ROLL HERE

LOOK WHERE WE ARE IT'S THE SAND DRAGS

MIDDLE OF THE DESERT PEOPLE JUST LINED UP IN A BEAUTIFUL LINE, IT'S A 1/4 MILE OF NO RULE HAVEN FOOT TO THE FLOOR, SAND FLYING MAYHEM

RIGHT NOW I HAVE EXCITING NEWS FOR EVERYONE WHO WORKS ON THE SHOW AND YOU GUYS THAT WATCH IT COMES FROM MIKE, BIG TOMATO GAS MAN (LAUGHS) MIKE SAYS HEY, HE DIDN'T SAY HEY, I KEEP ADDING THAT MIKE JUST SAYS I JUST HAPPENED UPON THE PROGRAM THIS EVENING HERE IN COLLINSVILLE, ILLINOIS IT'S AWESOME HE I THINK THAT MEANS ME IS AT SOME SAND DUNE MOTOR FESTIVAL, WILD, I LOVE IT GREAT STUFF, HERE COMES THE GOOD PART

YOU DEFINITELY GET THE BIG TOMATO SEAL OF APPROVAL (APPLAUSE) VERY NICE, CONGRATULATIONS TO US

I HAVE, I HAVE MORE EVIDENCE RIGHT HERE THAT YOU GUYS CONTRIBUTE TO THIS SHOW, TO PROGRAMMING THIS SHOW I WANT TO THANK TAMMY FOR EMAILING US AND SUGGESTING WE CHECK OUT THE BURLESQUE WORLD CHAMPIONSHIPS

SO TELL US WHAT WE'RE GOING TO SEE WITH YOUR ACT? TONIGHT WHAT I'M DOING IS GEISHA AND IT'S BURLESQUE WHAT WE'RE SEEING HERE CAN YOU TELL THE FOLKS AT HOME WHAT IS GOING ON? THIS IS MY GIRLFRIEND JULIETTE LES MUSE ONE OF THE GREATEST PERFORMERS EVER HOW WOULD YOU DESCRIBE BURLESQUE TO SOMEONE WHO LIKE ME IS COMING INTO IT TONIGHT, DIDN'T KNOW VERY MUCH ABOUT IT, HOW WOULD YOU DESCRIBE BURLESQUE BURLESQUE IS STRIP TEASE SO YOUR ALWAYS GOING TO BE TAKING SOMETHING OFF AND YOUR NEVER GOING TO SEE A LOT OF NUDITY, IT'S NOT GOING TO BE RAUNCHY, IT'LL BE FUNNY AND BODY AND SASSY DEPENDING ON THE PERFORMER BUT IT'LL NEVER BE STRIPPER SO YOU'LL NEVER SEE NUDITY, THERE IS ALWAYS PASTIES AND IT'S ALWAYS VERY TASTEFUL THISIS ONE OF HER MOST FAMOUS ROUTINES YOU JUST GOTTA WATCH IT, IT'LL BLOW YOUR MIND AND IT WILL MAKE YOU CRY GOING INTO THIS I DIDN'T KNOW ABOUT BURLESQUE AT ALL, I HAD NO IDEA I MEAN THE VARIETY THAT YOU SEE BACK HERE I PICKED UP ON SOMETHING ELSE THAT I DIDN'T KNOW ABOUT TONIGHT, THERE IS ALSO FUN TO THIS LIKE IT'S ALL EVERYONE IS SMILING IT'S WITH AN ABSOLUTE SENSE OF HUMOR WHAT ARE YOU, WHAT IS THAT CALLED A THOSE ARE PASTIES BUT LOOK SHE'S GOT SKILLS THAT IS THE BEAUTIFUL SHANGHI PRO FROM SEATTLE WASHINGTON I'M GETTING HYPNOTIZED -YES

SHANGHI GIRL TELL US WHAT AWARD YOU WON TONIGHT I WON SECOND RUNNER UP FOR WHAT IS THE CATEGORY? -OH FOR MISS EXOTIC WORLD

CAN YOU TALK TO PEOPLE OUT THERE THAT HAVEN'T BEEN EXPOSED TO BURLESQUE, TALK TO THEM RIGHT NOW THEY'VE NEGLECTED BURLESQUE -DON'T BE SCARED YOU NEED TITTIES AND IT'S NOT STRIPPING YEAH JUST FOR THE RECORD IT'S THEATRICAL ART, IT'S DANCE IT'S MOVEMENT, IT'S CHARACTER IT'S AMAZING WE'RE TAKING OFF OUR CLOTHES ON STAGE SO IT'S STRIPPING IT'S STRIPPING IN IT'S FINEST FORM IN THE WAY THAT THERE IS A WINK AND A NOD THERE IS A TEASE

THIS IS EXCITNG, I HAVE AN INSPRIATIONAL AND MOVING EMAIL RIGHT HERE, IT'S FROM MIKE MIKE SAYS I DON'T USUALLY EMAIL ABOUT SHOW CONTENT BUT I GOTTA TELL YOU AFTER WATCHING THE RECENT EPISODE ON MOTORCYCLE HILL CLIMBING I WAS SO IMPRESSED AND INSPRIED BY THE 87 YEAR OLD CLIMBER, THAT'S HIM RIGHT THERE THAT I'VE GOTTEN BACK INTO MOTORCYCLING ALSO I'M 61 MYSELF THANK YOU FOR SHOWING THAT EPISODE, BET YOU DIDN'T THINK SOME OF YOUR CONTENT WAS SO INSPIRATIONAL AND LIFE CHANGING WE TO BE HONEST WITH YOU MIKE, WE HAD NO IDEA THAT IT WAS INSPIRATIONAL OR LIFE CHANGING BUT I'M GLAD THAT IT WAS THAT IS VERY..THAT'S A COOL ONE, CAN WE FRAME THAT ONE GET SOMEONE ON THAT, SEND KAT OUT TO GET A FRAME AT FRAMES PLUS OKAY UM, I WANT TO SHOW MORE EVIDENCE THAT WE LISTEN TO YOU GUYS YOU WROTE US, YOU SAID GO TO LAS VEGAS FOR NEW YEARS, THEY CLOSE DOWN THE STRIP AND LET EVERYONE JUST DRINK AND BE CRAZY SO WE WENT THERE WE'RE CELEBRATING THE DRUNKEST NIGHT OF THE YEAR WE'RE IN LAS VEGAS, NEVADA THEY'VE CLOSED THE STREET, THE VEGAS STRIP IS ACTUALLY CLOSED TO TRAFFIC, IT'S ONLY DRUNK PEOPLE TONIGHT EXHIBIT A, LET'S DO THIS

THERE ARE SOME PEOPLE THAT ACTUALLY WENT TO A CLUB TONIGHT NO! WHO DOES THAT?

YOU DON'T HOPE TO RUN FOR OFFICE SOME DAY DO YOU? HE'S GOING TO RUN FOR OFFICE AND YOUR GOING TO PLAY THIS BACK THAT'S WHAT I'M ASKING ABOUT YOUR GOING TO PLAY THIS BACK AND HE'S GOING TO GET SHUT OFF, HE'S GOING TO GET DIVORCED THAT'S A REPUBLICAN RIGHT THERE -HE'S GOING TO GET DIVORCED LOOK AT ME I'M F# # KED UP DUDE I'M F# # KED DUDE WE ALSO ON THE SAME CHANNEL WE HAVE A SHOW CALLED DAN RATHER REPORTS I JUST HOPE THAT THERE WASN'T A MIX UP IN THE GUIDE AND THEY THOUGHT THEY WERE WATCHING DAN RATHER BECAUSE THEY'RE CLEARLY NOT THIS SPECIAL IS CALLED THE DRUNKEST NIGHT OF THE YEAR THAT WOULDN'T HURT HIS CAREER YEAH (SLURS) CAREER

WHO'S HOTTER ME OR HER? THAT'S A HANDS DOWN RIGHT HERE BUDDY NO, SHE'S MINE YOU CAN'T TOUCH HER UH-OH HE'S POUNDING THAT THING (LAUGHS) NICE HAT OH THAT HAT IS GREAT

SHOW US YOUR SHIRT WHAT'S THAT SHIRT? YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN LOT OF PEOPLE OUT THERE MIGHT BE STUDYING TELEVISION IN SCHOOL MAYBE SOME COMMUNICATIONS MAJORS RIGHT? I DON'T LIKE COMMUNICATION MAJORS -WHATEVER I JUST WANT TO TELL THEM THAT IF THEY'RE STUDYING TELEVISION AND THEY WANT TO KNOW WHAT T.V. GOLD IS, THIS GUY, YOU ARE T.V. GOLD T.V. GOLD -HOT HOT I LIKE TOM BRADY -AND WHEN YOU HAVE THESE TWO INGREDIENTS YOU HAVE A SUCCESSFUL SHOW I HAVE AN EMAIL FROM TRAVIS RIGHT HERE LOVE YOUR SHOW IT'S REFRESHING TO WATCH A SHOW LIKE YOURS, YOU KEEP IT REAL AND EXCITING, THAT'S WHAT'S COOL ABOUT IT, IT'S NOT OVER DONE

LADIES AND GENTLEMAN HERE IS THE ANSWER TO TRAVIS' EMAIL ART MANN GREAT EMAIL TRAVIS THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR SENDING THAT IN, COULDN'T AGREE WITH YOU MORE

QUICK ONE HERE FROM DAVID IN ROCHESTER, THE CITY WHERE NOTHING HAPPENS AND DAVID WROTE THAT, I DID NOT SAY THAT SO NO ANGRY EMAILS FROM THE ROCH DAVID IS BASICALLY SAYING I LOVE THE SHOW CAN YOU TELL US THE DATES OF THESE UPCOMIGN EVENTS MY WIFE AND I WOULD LIKE TO TRAVEL AND ATTEND SOME OF THEM WE TOOK CARE OF YOU DAVID, GO TO ARTMANN.COM WE HAVE THE UPCOMING EVENTS, THERE YOU GO, HELLO TAKING CARE OF THE VIEWERS, HOW THEM THE CRAZINESS, THANK YOU LOOK AT YOU WOW, WE'RE JUST LIKE A REAL SHOW TONIGHT THAT IS CRAZINESS, THAT IS CALLED THE FOLSUM STREET FAIR WE GOT AN EMAIL GUY BASICALLY SAID GO UP TO FOLSOM, CHECK IT OUT YOU'LL SEE CRAZINESS, IT'LL BE WILD AND IT'LL BE A GREAT SHOW WHAT HE DIDN'T TELL US AND MAYBE HE COULD HAVE JUST PUT P.S. LOTS OF MAN ASS, JUST A QUICK, RIGHT? JUST A LITTLE UH, MA HU AT THE END A LITTLE MAN ASS HEADS UP THAT'S ALL BUT WE CHECKED IT OUT AND IT WAS FUN SO TAKE A LOOK IT'S THE FOLSOM STREET FAIR WE'RE IN SAN FRANCISCO FOR THE FOLSOM STREET FAIR IT'S ART WE'VE SEEN SOME WEIRD SH# T TODAY DID YOU BUY THOSE HERE? -I DID I DON'T THINK YOU CAN SEE THIS ANYWHERE ELSE

I WANT YOU TO DESCRIBE THIS RIGHT NOW UH, SHOCKING YOU GOTTA TELL ME WHAT IS GOING ON HERE BECAUSE THIS IS SOME CRAZY..FOR A GUY LIKE ME ROAMING INTO THIS, THIS IS A CRAZY SCENE TALK TO US ABOUT THIS OUTFIT WELL I USUALLY DO ROPE WORK ON OTHER PEOPLE BUT JUST WANTED TO DO A LITTLE MYSELF WHAT IS THIS DEVICE RIGHT NEXT TO YOU HERE THIS IS F# # K ZILLA SAY THAT ONE MORE TIME -THIS IS F# # K ZILLA SINCE YOUR SO PASSIONATE TELL THEM RIGHT NOW WHY THEY SHOULD COME TO THIS UH OH ASS... (LAUGHS)

CAUSE IT FEELS GOOD

TELL MY T.V. FRIENDS OUT THERE SOME OF THE THINGS THAT YOU'VE SEEN TODAY WHAT I'VE SEEN, OH CAN I SAY SOME THINGS? YEAH GO FOR IT I'VE SEEN ASSES -A LOT OF ASS I'VE SEEN MASSES -NICE AND SOME OTHER I WONT MENTION YOU WANT TO TELL ANYONE A MESSAGE ABOUT THIS LIKE WHY THEY SHOULD COME TO THIS FOLSOM STREET FAIR THE ONLY PLACE IN THE WORLD WE CAN BE FREE AND LEATHER AND NAKED AND IT DOESN'T MATTER NICE. JAMES IS WRITING TO US RIGHT HERE SAYS I THOUGHT YOU MIGHT BE INTERESTED IN DOING A SHOW IN MY HOME TOWN OF BYRON, ILLINOIS EVERY YEAR A LOCAL BAR PUTS ON WHAT THEY CALL THE TURKEY TESTICLE FESTIVAL WE LOVE THE SUGGESTIONS JAMES, BUT AS YOU CAN SEE HERE WE ALREADY HAD SOME GOOD UH, BULL BALL EATING AND QUITE FRANKLY I THINK JUST ONE BALL EATING FESTIVAL REALLY IS ALL YOU NEED TO DO, RIGHT? ONCE YOU HAD A COUPLE OF THOSE LOOK RIGHT THERE HE IS RIGHT THERE, EWWW YUMMY I REALLY CAN'T SEE ME MUNCHING DOWN THE LITTLE GOBBLERS NUTS AS I ALREADY DID IT TO THE BULL SO THANKS FOR THE SUGGESTION JAMES, BUT WE'RE NOT GOING TO GO EAT THOSE NEXT UP THIS IS FROM BELINDA AND BELINDA SAYS FIRST OFF MY HUSBAND AND I LOVE THE SHOW SAYS YOU'RE A LUCKY MAN, THAT'S FOR SURE IT'S LIKE I WON A CONTEST THIS IS HER FRIEND DAVID BRADSHAW OKAY, AND SHE CLAIMS ANYWAY THAT HE IS MY TWIN, I'M SEEING A GIANT ORB ON TOP OF HIS NECK AND OF COURSE HE HAS SOME GLASSES ON BUT UH, THAT DOESN'T QUALIFY HIM AS AN ART MANN LOOK ALIKE RIGHT? NO. DAVID DUDE, WHAT'S UP WITH THE, WE GOT HIM UP ON THE BIG SCREEN GO FULL SCREEN WITH HIM, LET THE FOLKS AT HOME SEE, DAVID, WHAT'S GOING ON? WHAT'S WITH THE SPILLAGE ON THE SHIRT BUDDY? YOU NEED TO THROW A BIB ON OH, JOE, SENT US AN EMAIL AND SAID WE HAVE TO CHECK OUT THE MANHATTAN BEACH SIX MAN IF I'D HEARD ABOUT THIS IT DOESN'T SOUND LIKE A SHOW TO ME, IT DOESN'T SOUND LIKE ANYTING I EVEN NEED TO SEE IT WAS AWESOME, MANHATTAN BEACH SIX MAN THIS IS WHAT WE KNOW, WE KNOW IT'S SIX MAN VOLLEYBALL WE KNOW IT ATTRACTS THE BEST CROWD IN THE WORLD, THIS IS AMAZING WE KNOW THERE IS SOME ALCOHOL THAT'S REALLY ALL WE KNOW, DO YOU KNOW HOW LONG THIS HAS BEEN GOING ON? YOU KNOW EVERYTHING YOU NEED TO KNOW ABOUT THIS TOURNAMENT THAT'S FANTASTIC WELL I'M A FRENCH MAID, I UNFORTUNATELY LOST MY FEATHER DUSTER BUT I LOST A LOT OF TIPS TOO DURING PLAY NO RULES. WE GOT 32 GUYS ON OUR TEAM OH SORRY ABOUT THAT, WE HAVE VOLLEYBALL PLAYERS AND THEN WE HAVE BEER DRINKERS TEAM HIGHER MAINTENANCE -IS THAT YOUR TEAM? WE'RE LOSING OUR VOICES FROM CHEERING TOO LOUD ALL RIGHT BUT HOW HAVE YOU DONE TODAY? WE DON'T HAVE TO SCREAM -WE DID REALLY WELL WE HAD THE BEST CHEERS HERE WE'VE BEEN ASKING PEOPLE ABOUT THIS, SUPPOSEDLY THEY'RE TWO TYPES OF TEAMS, TEAMS THAT WANT TO WIN AND TEAMS THAT WANT TO DRINK YEAH -BUT WE'RE LEARNING TODAY THAT THERE IS NO REAL LINE THERE WHAT DO YOU MEAN THERE'S NO, OF COURSE THERE IS NO REAL LINE YOU WANT TO DRINK, YOU WANT TO BE THE BEST TEAM THAT'S DRINKING TELL THEM WHAT THEY'RE MISSING RIGHT NOW GET RIGHT IN THERE HERMOSA BEACH/MANHATTAN BEACH THIS IS WHERE IT'S AT WE'RE GOING TO LOOK AT ANOTHER THIS IS OUR FINAL ONE OF THE NIGHT, VIEWER SUGGESTED LOCATION THIS ONE IS ST. PATRICK'S DAY IN DALLAS WHO KNEW THAT DALLAS WAS THE HOME TO SO MANY IRISH PEOPLE I DIDN'T KNOW, I DIDN'T KNOW THAT IT'S NOT, IT IS THE HOME OF PEOPLE THAT LIKE TO DRINK AND WEAR GREEN STUFF WE'RE GOING TO SEE HOW TEXAS DOES ST. PATRICK'S DAY

ART MANN THAT'S MY FAVORITE SHOW ON HDNet HAPPY ST. PATRICK'S DAY IT'S ALL ABOUT THE IRISH, IT'S ALL ABOUT THE GIRLS THE BLONDE IRISH GIRLS ST. PADDY'S DAY IN DALLAS, IT'S WHAT WE LIVE FOR SHE'S HOTTER THAN YOU -I'M SO IRISH, I CAN DRINK MORE THAN ANYONE

SO YOU CAN'T SEE IT FROM DOWN HERE BUT WHERE KEITH IS STANDING RIGHT NOW HE CAN SEE JUST A SEA OF GREEN DRUNK PEOPLE AND I LOVE IT THAT ABOUT SUMS IT UP ART TELL ME THE TRUE MEANING OF ST. PATRICK'S DAY RIGHT NOW WHAT DOES IT MEAN TO YOU? GET DRUNK, I DON'T KNOW NO, I DIDN'T EXPECT YOU TO MAKE SOMETHING UP -GOLD, MONEY, LUCK YOU KNOW -WHAT WAS THE QUESTION? I WANT TO KNOW THE TRUE MEANING OF ST. PATRICK'S DAY, WHAT IS IT ALL ABOUT GOOD SEX -IS IT? YES SET GO, GO, GO

(LAUGHS) WE STARTED WITH THE PARADE, PEOPLE WERE DRINKING AT THE PARADE THIS MORNING I WAS THERE, IT WAS MY BREAKFAST, I'VE THROWN AWAY HALF MY CUPS AND I'M GOING TO THROW AWAY THESE AND I MAY GET SOME MORE IT'S COMING OUT YOUR NOSE (LAUGHS) THAT WAS AWESOME THIS MIGHT BE GOOD IS THIS A TIP HERE TO KEEP TRACK OF HOW MANY BEERS YOU'VE HAD IS THAT WHAT'S HAPPENING? NO, ACTUALLY I DON'T HAVE ANY PLASTIC CUPS AT HOME I'M HERE REPRESENTING UTAH NICE -AND I LOVE YOU OH, SH# T HAPPY ST. PADDY'S DAY -THANK YOU VERY MUCH ARE YOU GUYS FROM HERE? -NO WE'RE NOT I'M FROM TENNESSEE DUDE THAT WAS U TARDED THANK YOU, THANK YOU THAT WAS AWESOME NOW WOULD YOU RECOMMEND DALLAS FOR ST. PATRICKS DAY? ABSOLUTELY, ABSOLUTELY IN SOME OF THESE CITIES THERE IS A PROBLEM WITH OVERCROWDING AND A LOT OF TRAFFIC I AGREE THERE GO MY PANTS -FILL ME IN THE SUN IS GOING DOWN THEY'RE GOING TO CLOSE THIS THING WHAT'S GOING TO HAPPEN LOOK AT WHILE WE'RE CHIT CHATTING LOOK AT WHAT'S GOING ON OVER THERE I SEE BREASTS I DON'T WANT TO BE RUDE OR DISRESPECTFUL NO WORRIES -DID YOU WET YOURSELF? NO, I DID NOT BUT I'M NOT AFRAID OF IT THIS IS FROM JEN, HEY ART AND STAFF IS THERE ANYWAY YOU CAN POST THAT DRUNK BADGER GUY FROM THE WISCONSIN EPISODE ON YOU TUBE OR SOMETHING? I WOULD LOVE TO SEE HIM IN HIS FULL GLORY GREAT JOB, KEEP EM COMING WE'RE GOING TO DO BETTER THAN THAT, YOUR GOING TO SEE HIM RIGHT NOW IN HIS HIGH DEF GLORY WE ARE A TRAVEL SHOW SO I WANT SOME UH, WISCONSIN FACTS, GIMME SOME FACTS, BY ALL MEANS... THE BADGER STATE, WHY IS IT CALLED THAT? IT'S CALLED THE BADGER STATE BECAUSE IN THESE LITTLE CREEKS ON THE SIDE OF THE WOODS THEY HAVE BADGERS FLOATING UP AND THEY WILL TEAR YOU APART MAN THEY WILL, THEY WILL THEY'LL BITE YOU MAN, YOU DON'T WANT TO MESS WITH THEM SO WHY ARE WE GLORIFYING THEM MAKING IT THE BADGER STATE YOU ARE TOO? -ALL RIGHT MAN GIMME SOME MORE WISCONSIN FACTS ALL RIGHT WISCONSIN FACTS EXIST, WE HEY WISCONSIN -WE WANT SOME PUSSY WISCONSIN PEOPLE DRINK MORE THAN ANYONE EVER, I PROMISE THAT EXCEPT GERMAN PEOPLE BECAUSE GERMAN PEOPLE ARE CRAZY BUT WISCONSIN PEOPLE DRINK WISCONSIN PEOPLE LOVE THEIR CHEESE THEY LOVE THEIR CHEESE -WE'RE GOING TO BE ON HELL T.V. THAT'S WHY WE'RE SO FAT WHAT IS IT ABOUT THE CHEESE THAT EVERYONE LIKES? I DON'T KNOW IT MAKES EVERYONE FAT, IT MAKES EVERYONE FAT AROUND HERE, EVERYONE IS A FAT ASS, HAVEN'T YOU SEE WISCONSIN IS A FAT F# # KING COUNTRY (LAUGHS) IT'S A STATE -SUMMERFEST YOU NOT ONLY ARE YOU T.V. GOLD BUT YOU HAVE A LOT OF KNOWLEDGE IN THERE BY ALL MEANS SO TELL ME ABOUT SUMMERFEST GIMME A LITTLE, HOW DID THIS GET STARTED? SUMMERFEST GOT STARTED IN 1972 BY A GOD DAMN PESON WHO BELIEVED THAT PEOPLE GETTING TOGETHER DRINKING ALCOHOL AND LISTENING TO MUSIC WAS A GOOD THING AND UH, IT IS, IT REALLY IS PEOPLE DRINKING ALCOHOL AND LISTENING TO MUSIC IS A GOOD THING GOD BLESS SUMMERFEST (SCREAMS) NOW THE MORE I LOOK AT DAVID RIGHT HERE I DO SORT OF LOOK LIKE HIM BECAUSE HE HAS THE LITTLE TEETH YOU KNOW AND NO SECRET I HAVE A LITTLE EXTRA SKIN RIGHT HERE HIS HEAD MIGHT ACTUALLY BE LARGER WHICH IS HUGE BECAUSE I'VE ONLY INTERVIEWED TWO PEOPLE WITH A LARGER MELON THAN ME JAY LENO AND NASCARS DALE JARRETT BOTH GIANT HEADS BUT DAVID I DON'T KNOW ABOUT JAY OR DALE, DAVID IT'S YOUR LUCKY NIGHT MY FRIEND FOR BEING SUCH A GOOD SPORT AND LETTING US MAKE FUN OF THE DOME AND THE SPLOOGE ON THE SHIRT YOU GET AN ART MANN PRESENTS KANGAROO SCROTUM THERE IS A KANGAROO THANKS FOR CONNECTING THE DOTS OH, THAT'S EVEN BETTER, THAT'S WHERE THEY NORMALLY LIVE THIS IS GOING TO LIVE WHEREEVER IN YOUR HANDS AND IF YOU WANT ONE YOUCAN GO TO ART MANN.COM AND GET ONE IT'S THE REAL THING WE'VE HAD EMAILS, PEOPLE DON'T THINK THAT THIS EXISTS, THEY THOUGHT IT WAS A JOKE IT'S AN AMP KANGAROO SCROTUM NO OTHER SHOW IS DOING THIS, I'VE SEEN MUGS AND HATS AND TOWELS BEACH TOWELS, NEVER A SACK THANKS FOR WATCHIGN YOU GUYS, SEE YOU NEXT TIME IF THERE IS A NEXT TIME, IT'S ALWAYS UP IN THE AIR I THINK YOU KNOW DAY TO DAY WITH THIS SHOW