Art Mann Presents...

Episode Number: 310 - TV 1

Episode Title: Fiesta San Antonio

Description: This week we enjoy frog legs, bull nuts, snails, and great people at one of the biggest parties in Texas.

Transcript:

OH WHAT A GREAT WAY TO START THE SHOW YOUR LOOKING AT A SHOT OF THE ALAMO WE'RE IN SAN ANTONIO, TEXAS. SAN ANTONIO KNOWN FOR THIS OF COURSE THE ALAMO. KNOWN FOR THE SPURS, I'M SURE WE'RE GOING TO HEAR SOME PEOPLE SCREAMING ABOUT THEM AT SOME POINT TONIGHT AND IT'S HOME TO WHAT A LOT OF PEOPLE CALL THE LARGEST PARTY IN TEXAS. AND THAT'S WHY WE'RE HERE IT'S CALLED FIESTA SAN ANTONIO AND LET'S GET TO IT WHY JUST HAVE ME WALKING, THIS IS BEAUTIFUL AND THAT DOES SHOW OFF THE HIGH DEF GOODNESS, THAT BIG T.V. YOU PAID FOR. BUT YOU WANT TO SEE DRUNK PEOPLE DON'T YOU? YEAH LET'S SEE THAT. YOU'LL PROBABLY ALSO SEE ME STUFF MY FACE BECAUSE THIS THING IS ALL ABOUT THE FOOD. SENIOR MARIPOSA '07 (SCREAMS) HDNet ROCKS! ART MANN ON HDNet (SCREAMS) FIESTA WHOO! (ART'S THEME MUSIC STARTS)

LET ME EXPLAIN WHAT WE'RE GOING TO FOCUS ON HERE BECAUSE THERE ARE A LOT OF EVENTS THERE IS LIKE 800 EVENTS AROUND FIESTA SAN ANTONIO WHAT WE ARE TOLD, WHAT OUR RECON TELLS US IS THIS EVENT, TAKE A LOOK, SHOW THEM THE SIGN STEVE. A NIGHT IN OLD SAN ANTONIO. THIS IS THE EVENT TO FOCUS ON. IT IS 7 ACRES OF GOOD TIMES AND WE ARE GONG INSIDE RIGHT NOW.

SO I'M SAYING IT RIGHT? NE-O-SA NE-O-SA I GREW UP IN SAN ANTONIO AND I SAID NIE-OSA EVERYBODY SAYS NIE-OSA BUT WHEN THEY TOLD ME DO YOU SAY FIESTA OR FI-ESTA -THANK YOU. OKAY. AND IT'S AN ACRONYM FOR NIGHT IN OLD SAN ANTONIO MORE IMPORTANTLY FOR GUYS LIKE ME WHO ENJOY THE FOOD, IT'S ALL ABOUT FOOD. SO MANY FOOD BOOTHS.

TELL ME ABOUT THE HATS. IS THERE A TRADITION OF HATS AT THIS EVENT. NO PURELY ACCIDENTAL THEY ALL DECIDED WHERE ARE YOU FROM, HI, HOW YOU DOIN? I'M OSCAR SAN ANTONIO BEEN HERE ALL MY LIFE I DON'T KNOW WHAT NIOSA STANDS FOR BUT IT SURE IS GOOD. THIS IS A BEAUTIFUL PIECE OF CHICKEN DEEP FRIED WITH A JALAPE}O ON A STICK YOU COULDN'T GET THAT AT ANY RESTAURANT IN SAN ANTONIO THAT WAS GOLD, RIGHT? -YES, VERY GOLD DID YOU FEEL THAT, DID YOU GET THE CHILLS? IT WAS HOT. IF YOU FRY SOMETHING AND THROW IT ON A STICK, BASICALLY ANYTHING IS GOING TO BE DELICIOUS HUH? YES SIR, AND AFTER ABOUT 20 BEERS YOUR GOOD TO GO MAN. THIS IS ALL ABOUT FOOD, RIGHT? WHAT IS THE ONE ITEM THAT YOU GUYS RECOMMEND THAT WE NEED TO PUSH DOWN OUR FACE BEFORE WE LEAVE? JAMBALAYA RIGHT HERE. JAMBALAYA WOMEN'S TURKEY LEGS? -NICE (LAUGHS) WE ARE IN OLD SAN ANTONIO RIGHT NOW. THIS IS LAVIETA, YEAH OLD SAN ANTONIO. WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT IS THE TRANSLATION OF THAT LAVIETA WELL LAVIETA IS SMALL, VERY SMALL TOWN. TELL US WHAT IS IN THIS. IT IS SAUSAGE, RICE, AND SPICES THAT'S HIGH DEFINITION JAMBALAYA

LOOK AT THAT. WHOA MY ALL RIGHT, TELL THE AUDIENCE HOW DOES IT TASTE OUT THERE? THAT'S DELICIOUS I LIKE THE LITTLE BITE YOU GAVE IT. GIMME SOME WORDS IN SPANISH FOR YOU KNOW SLIGHTLY DRUNK SLIGHTLY DRUNK, BORRACHO THAT'S THE BEST WORD SOME WEEKS WE DO STUFF ON THE SHOW THAT I WOULD BE EMBARRASSED MY MOM MIGHT SAY SOMETHING, THIS WEEK SHE'S GOING TO YELL AT ME FOR TALKING WITH MY MOUTH FULL.

YOU CAN'T GO WITHOUT THIS -OH! TELL EVERYONE, COME BACK, TELL EVERYONE WHAT YOU JUST DID, WHAT IS THAT? THAT IS A TRADITION FOR BREAKING THE CASCARONES IT MEANS YOUR GOING TO HAVE GOOD LUCK, A HAPPY LIFE -THANK YOU THAT'S WHAT THAT MEANS. SWEET POTATO PIE, AND PECAN PIE AND WE HAVE BREAD PUDDING WITH BOURBON SAUCE. THAT'S LIKE A HOLLOWED OUT EGG YES, IT'S A HOLLOWED EGG AND IT'S FULL OF CONFETTI AND WHEN SOMEONE BREAKS ONE ON YOU THAT MEANS YOUR GOING TO HAVE GOOD LUCK FOR THE REST OF THE YEAR.

I LOVE YOU LONG TIME (LAUGHS)

FRIED JALAPE}OS TAKE A CHARBROILED MEAT BALL HERE AND PUT IT IN BATTER WITH A LITTLE JALAPE}O AND CHEESE SHREDDED UP, PUT IT IN THE FRYER AND FRY IT UP WHEN IT POPS THE TOP AT THE CLOCK TIME FOR THE SNAILS. -C'MON BERNADETTE HE WANTS TO HAVE ESCARGOT. -HELLO (LAUGHS) WELL HECK I STARTED OUT DOING THIS I ONLY WEIGHTED ABOUT 120 POUNDS. PUT THAT THING UP HERE, WE'LL GET A CLOSE LOOK AT THAT. HERE WE GO. LET ME SEE ONE OF THOSE THINGS THAT'S WHAT IT IS RIGHT THERE. -LOOK AT THAT. FULLY COOKED AND READY TO GO. -ESSENTIALLY IT'S A FRIED MEATBALL WHICH I LOVE I SMELL SNAIL. -SNAIL THAT'S WHAT IT IS YES. WE HAVE SNAIL HERE THAT WE SAUTEE IN WINE HEY, I WANT YOU TO TALK TO SOME OF THE PEOPLE OUT THERE THAT SHOW UP AT THIS EVENT AND THEIR ON A DIET. THEY'RE ON A DIET, WELL BUDDY LOOK AT ME RIGHT HERE, LOOK AT ME THE WAY WE EAT OUT HERE, THIS IS HEALTH FOOD. I PUT SOME WEIGHT ON, YOU KNOW I'M A HEALTHY FELLA. IN MY YARD I GET SOME MUSHROOMS THEY POP UP AND I KNOW YOUR NOT SUPPOSED TO EAT THOSE. IN MY YARD, I ALSO HAVE SNAILS THAT CLIMB ON MY PLANTS. WELL THESE ARE ACTUALLY FRENCH SNAILS. THEY COME FROM FRANCE. I LIKE HOW THERE'S NO SECRET, THIS IS FAT BREAD THIS IS FAT BREAD. TELL PEOPLE IF THERE ARE PEOPLE OUT THERE WATCHING IF THEY HAVEN'T HAD THIS YET, WELL YOU'D BE SURPRISED PEOPLE COME TO NIOSA JUST FOR THIS. JUST FOR THE SNAILS. WHAT IS ON THAT THING? -FAT BREAD. ENGLISH MUFFIN -RIGHT. MUSHROOMS MOZZARELLA CHEESE -OF COURSE. AND THE MUSHROOMS ARE SAUTE ED IN GARLIC AND BUTTER. THAT'S A SNAIL RIGHT THERE. -THAT'S A SNAIL. YOU KNOW THAT'S A GUY WHO LIKES EATING, JUST GRAB ANYTHING ON THE TOOTHPICK AND

THAT'S NOT BAD. -NOT BAD. HOW DO I EAT THIS? I JUST SHOVE THIS IN MY FACE? -THAT'S RIGHT. LET'S SHOW EVERYONE AT HOME.

ANY CHEESE ON ME? IT'S A LITTLE WEIRD LIKE TRYING TO LET IS SLIDE DOWN YOUR THROAT. HEY GLEN, LET'S SEE IF GLEN. NOT HAPPENING, NOT HAPPENING WHY ARE YOU STANDING THERE NOT BUYING THE FAT BREAD? YOU SHOULD COME OVER HERE THE BEST DEAL OVER THERE BANANA SPLITS FOR 4 COUPONS. BANANA SPLITS. -YEAH TO WASH THAT DOWN WITH DO YOU LIKE YOUR MEN FAT DOWN HERE IN SAN ANTONIO? YOU DO. YOU THINK A BIG MAN IS SEXY, RIGHT? PROOF RIGHT HERE. I LIKE EM, YOU LIKE HIM? DOES HE LIKE HIM? YOU LIKE EM? I WILL TAKE YOU UP ON YOUR BANANA SPLIT BUT DO YOU SEE WHAT'S RIGHT BEHIND YOU? FRIED CHEESECAKE CHEESECAKE IS ALREADY PRETTY FATTENING RIGHT THERE AND NOW WE'RE GOING TO FRY IT SO WHO CARES. RIGHT? CHEESECAKE IN DOUGH DEEP FRIED YOU LIKE A FAN MAN DON'T YOU? I LOVE A FAT MAN BECAUSE YOU CLEARLY ARE TRYING TO FATTEN EVERYONE UP. MY FAT MAN IS WORKING IN THE BEER BOOTH DOWN ON THE ROAD. FRIED CHEESE CAKE, HERE WE GO.

OH MY GOD, WHAT CAN YOU SAY? THAT'S CRAZY GOOD. I THINK NOW WOULD BE A GOOD TIME FOR A BREAK. I SEE THE BANANA SPLIT LADIES ARE READY TO DRAG ME OVER THERE. THAT'S GOOD STUFF TOO EXCEPT THEY'RE IN THE SUNSHINE. WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK AND YOU CAN WATCH ME EAT MORE FOOD RIGHT AFTER THE BREAK. VERY EXCITING STUFF.

I THOUGHT THIS WAS JUST LIKE A FESTIVAL WITH THE DANCING AND MAYBE A PARADE AND SO FORTH SOME DRINKING RIGHT? OH WE HAVE EVERYTHING. YEAH YOU KNOW I BEEN TRYING TO DO THE JARED THING, YOU KNOW WHAT THAT IS? -YES. I'VE BEEN TRYING TO DO THE JARED THING AND T'S ALL A WASTE BECAUSE WHEN I GOT HERE YOU GUYS ARE SUCH A BAD INFLUENCE WE HAVE EVERYTHING BAD FOR YOU THAT'S REALLY, REALLY GOOD BANANA SPLITS, FAT BREAD PRETZELS FRIED GREEN TOMATOES

AS I LOOK AROUND HERE I SEE FOODS I'VE NEVER HEARD OF. I SEE FROG LEGS, FRIED GREEN TOMATOES. IS THERE SOMETHING BESIDES THE BANANA SPLITS OF COURSE THAT YOU RECOMMEND WE TRY BEFORE WE LEAVE. I KNOW OUR FAT BREAD IS VERY POPULAR. TELL US WHAT YOU HAVE. -WE HAVE ARMADILLO EGGS. WHAT EXACTLY IS THAT? -IT IS A STUFFED JALAPE}O WITH CREAM CHEESE OR CHEDDAR CHEESE. FRIED OKRA -FRIED OKRA? VERY GOOD. -CAN I TRY ONE? OF COURSE. IT'S DELICIOUS SOUTHERN OH WOW. WHAT ARE WE DRINKING? -CHAMPAGNE NICE. HOW ABOUT THE REST OF THE FAMILY HERE. -MARGARITAS NICE! WELL OKRA IS A SOUTHERN VEGETABLE, GROWS VERY WELL IN HOT, HOT, HOT HEAT SO IT DOES GREAT IN SOUTH TEXAS. AND PEOPLE GENERALLY THINK OF IT AS A SLIMY VEGETABLE BUT THIS WAY IT'S BREADED AND DEEP FRIED.

TELL ME ABOUT THIS PRODUCT. THIS IS THE FRIED GREEN TOMATOES LIKE YOU WOULD SEE IN THE MOVIE. AND WE JUST TAKE A BATTER, FRY UP SOME TOMATOES AND SELL THEM UP. WE GOT FROG LEGS COOKIN FRESH, RIGHT OFF THE GRILL RIGHT HERE. TOMATO THAT HAPPENED TO BE GREEN OR IS IT NOT YEAH IT'S A TOMATO THAT IS NOT RIPE.

I AIN'T GONNA LIE TO YOU I LIKE THE WAY THEY LOOK AFTER THE BATTER'S ON THERE. DO YOU EAT THE FROG LEGS? I EAT THE FROG LEGS. THEY'RE MUCH BETTER THAN THE CAT FRIES. YOU NEVER WANT TO EAT THE CAT FRIES. EAT THE FROG LEGS. THAT'S LIKE A TESTICLE RIGHT? UH, YEAH (LAUGHS) HERE'S SOME RANCH DRESSING ON IT. IS IT NOT TRUE THAT IF YOU FRY SOMETHING AND PUT RANCH ON IT YOU COULD EAT JUST ABOUT ANYTHING? YES. LOOK AT THE WAY THIS THING IS STARING AT ME. OH, IT'S JUST WRONG, ISN'T IT A LITTLE. OH NO. SWEET AND GOOD. HERE'S YET ANOTHER SHOT OF ME EATING. FRIED GREEN TOMATO. -BON APPETITE THAT DOES COME WITH A SIDE ORDER OF LIPITOR (LAUGHS) I HAD AN EASIER TIME WITH THE SNAILS. THEY ARE NOT TOENAILS. THAT WAS, YOUR NOT FUNNY. IT'S A SMALL CHILD. ALL RIGHT, THERE IS AN ACTUAL FROG CALVE.

IT'S ACTUALLY GOOD ISN'T IT? YOU LIKE IT ADMIT IT. IT GOT STUCK IN MY TOOTH. YOU KNOW IT'S NOT BAD. -NO, IT'S NOT IT'S GOOD. I HAVE SOME ISSUES MENTALLY WITH IT THOUGH I THINK FILL ME IN. EXCITING AND FULL OF FIESTA 2007 ALL THE WAY. AWWW IT SQUIRTED WHY AREN'T YOU EATING THE FROG LEGS? -CAUSE I'M PREGNANT. AND I ALREADY HAVE TWO LITTLE FEET INSIDE OF ME KICKIN' I DON'T NEED ANOTHER ONE.

REE-BEEP I AIN'T GONNA LIE TO YOU, I DON'T FEEL RIGHT ABOUT THE FROG LEGS, IT FELT UNNATURAL. IT JUST DIDN'T SEEM RIGHT. HERE IS THE THING, ONCE YOU WEAR THOSE GLASSES, FROG LEG EATING THAT'S NO BIG DEAL. OH NO, THAT'S IT THIS IS THE BESET. WHAT IS THIS DEVICE YOUR WEARING? OH IT'S A WAY TO SURVIVE NIOSA. AND WHAT IS IN YOUR RIGHT HAND? NOTHING, -(LAUGHS) I'M NOT A COP. WHAT WOULD YOU SAY, WHAT IS THIS FESTIVAL ALL ABOUT. GIMME THE GIST OF IT. YOU KNOW I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT YOU KNOW WHAT THIS IS, THIS IS A STRESS RELIEVER THIS IS FUN. ALL RIGHT WHAT ARE WE EATING, GIMME THE LIST OF THINGS YOU'VE EATEN AT NIOSA PUFFY TACOS, SHISH KABOB'S AND OF COURSE YOU CAN'T GO WRONG WITH GORDITAS. -NICE! GIMME A LIST OF THE THINGS YOU'VE CONSUMED SINCE YOU GOT HERE. SINCE I GOT HERE, I'VE HAD 1, 2, 3, 4, ABOUT 7 BEERS. WHEN I GOT HERE, I WAS 130 POUNDS (LAUGHS) ME TOO!

WHAT YOU GOT HERE BUDDY? CALF FRIES ROCKY MOUNTAIN OYSTERS TRANSLATION UM, FRIED BULLS AREAS. BULL TESTICLES! STRAIGHT UP BALLS HUH? WHAT HAVE YOU EATEN THAT'S KIND OF WEIRD. I JUST ATE THE HORSESHOE SAUSAGE, THAT IS THE SPICIEST MEAT I'VE EVER EATEN. DESCRIBE WHAT JUST HAPPENED HERE. THEY CUT THEM IN STRIPS, THEY SEASON THEM, THEY DEEP FRY THEM, AND THEY'RE THE BEST (MOOING) C'MON YOU CAN DO IT. (LAUGHS) DO WE KNOW THE HISTORY OF THIS THING. THIS USED TO BE OLD SAN ANTONIO WHEN IT FIRST STARTED. THIS IS WHERE THE SETTLERS LANDED. THE ALAMO IS RIGHT DOWN THE STREET. -YOU CAN DO IT -I'VE COME HERE EVERY YEAR FOR THIS ONE SINGLE THING. CALF FRIES, IT'S THE ONLY PLACE YOU CAN GET THEM. SHOW ME HOW IT'S DONE.

NICE! HE DID IT. OH, WE'RE GOING TO TAKE A QUICK BREAK RIGHT NOW, AND WHEN WE COME BACK, OH NO. (CHEERS)

YEAH ! THAT'S GOOD LUCK RIGHT?

TELL THEM WHY THEY SHOULD COME HERE. IT'S THE BEST PARTY IN TOWN BABY! IN THE WORLD, WHOOO INSIDE MY STOMACH I GOT BULL NUTS, I GOT FROG LEGS, I HAVE SNAILS (LAUGHS) AM I IN ANY DANGER TODAY? OH I DOUBT IT OH WHEN YOUR IN NIOSA YOUR NEVER IN DANGER, YOUR IN GOOD HANDS. WE HAVE TO TAKE A QUICK BREAK. WHEN WE COME BACK, WILL THERE BE EVEN MORE DRINKING GOING ON? THEY'LL BE MORE DRINKING ALL NIGHT, ALL WEEK (SCREAMS) WHOO YEAH

HOW MANY BEERS HAVE YOU HAD? I DON'T EVEN KNOW. CAN'T EVEN COUNT THAT HIGH. WELCOME BACK EVERYBODY! WE'RE STILL IN SAN ANTONIO (SCREAMS)

-HAPPY BIRTHDAY SONYA HAPPY BIRTHDAY SONYA HAPPY 24. HEY TALK TO EVERYONE AT HOME. WHAT ARE THEY MISSING RIGHT NOW? UH ALL THE BEERS, ALL THE FUN, ALL THE FOOD. THIS RIGHT HERE IS FIESTA (SCREAMS)

(LAUGHS) (SCREAMS)

-ART! WHAT'S UP DUDE, TALK TO US RIGHT NOW. HEY, WHAT'S UP MAN? THEY ARE FINE. BEAUTIFUL EVERYWHERE. I'M VERY IMPRESSED WITH SAN ANTONIO. WHY THANK YOU I THINK THERE IS A GREAT ATTITUDE HERE. I THINK YOU GUYS ARE DOING A GREAT JOB KEEPING THE ORDER OF COURSE BUT I ALSO THINK A LOT OF IT HAS TO DO WITH THESE PEOPLE. -IT DOES. HEY IS EVERYONE ALWAYS THIS NICE. THEY'VE BEEN GIVING US FREE FOOD ALL DAY. SMILING FACES OH YEAH THIS PLACE THEY'RE ALWAYS NICE. WHAT IS THE PLAN RIGHT NOW? GONNA GET DRUNK? THIS IS THE PRIME EXAMPLE OF SAN ANTONIO RIGHT HERE. HERE WE GO RIGHT HERE GET THE FULL, GET THE FULL.

WHAT MAKES THIS THING SO SPECIAL? -IT'S COLLEGE NIGHT. THAT'S WHY IT'S OUT OF CONTROL. TELL EVERYONE WATCHING AROUND THAT COUNTRY WHAT THIS IS ALL ABOUT. IT'S OUT OF CONTROL. OUT OF CONTROL. -IT'S ABOUT GETTING KRUNK AND LOVE EACH DAY SAN ANTONIO THEY CALL ME EVONDALICIOUS BECAUSE THEY SAY I'M SO DELICIOUS TELL THEM WHAT THIS WOULD BE LIKE IF THEY WERE TO COME TO THIS. THEY WOULD BE AMAZING IT'S AWESOME. WE'RE HAVING A FUN TIME. GO SPURS GO! GIVE THEM A LIST OF THINGS AS THEY'RE PACKING UP AND THEY'RE ABOUT TO HEAD TO SAN ANTONIO WHAT SHOULD THEY BRING WITH THEM. MONEY! MORE MONEY! THESE ARE MY MEDALS YOU SEE MY FIESTA MEDALS? WHAT DO THEY REPRESENT? THEY REPRESENT YEARS OF FIESTA THAT I'VE PARTIED DUDE. HERE'S WHAT I NEED FROM YOU GUYS CAUSE WE'RE A TRAVEL SHOW. I NEED YOU TO GIVE THEM A LIST OF THINGS TO BRING WITH THEM IF THEY COME HERE. NO HEELS, BEER, LIQUOR, YOU GOTTA BRING A FIESTA HAT. YOU HAVE TO BRING MONEY, BEADS, MONEY, MONEY, MONEY FIESTA YEAH IT'S A GREAT TIME PEOPLE COMING FROM ALL OVER THE PLACE (SCREAMS) SHOW EVERYONE YOUR MEAT. NO YOUR MEAT. OH CANADA!

WHAT ARE YOU DRINKING? WHAT'S IN THE CUP? IT'S A WINE COOLER. WE NOTICE A CLEAR CHANGE FROM WHEN WE GOT HERE. WE GOT HERE, IT WAS SUNNY OUT YOU KNOW WE'RE JUST HAVING A GOOD TIME EATING SNAILS AND EVERYTHING, IT WAS VERY CALM. WHAT HAS HAPPENED NOW. WHY HAS EVERYONE.. -NIGHT CRAWLERS.

HOW YOU DOIN' WHAT'S GOOD SAN ANTONE IT'S THAT BOY BUDDHA WHAT'S GOIN' WIT YOU BABY WHY DO WE SAVE THE CUPS? -SO WE CAN IT SHOWS WHAT A DRUNK YOU ARE HOW MANY BEERS THAT YOU'VE HAD. CAN I BUY YOU A DRINK OR DO YOU JUST WANT THE MONEY? I GOTTA THANK SAN ANTONIO FOR HAVING US. THIS IS A NICE CROWD. (ALL TALKING) I HAVE NOTICED THAT EVERYONE HERE IS SUPER NICE I KNOW IT SOUNDS LIKE I'M FULL OF CRAP BUT I'M BEING SERIOUS WHY IS THAT? WHAT IS IT ABOUT THIS PART OF THE WORLD IT'S A TEXAS THING. WE LOVE. WE'RE WASTED WHY IS THIS FESTIVAL SOMETHING THEY SHOULD CHECK OUT. THIS IS SAN ANTONIO THE HOME OF THE TONE, THE BEST PLACE IN THE WORLD THIS IS SAN ANTONIO FASHION AT IT'S FINEST TIGHT HERE WALK ME THROUGH THIS. START AT THOSE FEET THE NAILS ARE BEAUTIFULLY DONE. -THANK YOU YOU GUYS LIKE MY OUTFIT? -YEAH THIS IS MY GIRLFRIEND MONICA AND I JUST WANT TO SEE IF SHE'LL MARRY ME I WANT YOU TO MARRY ME YOU NOT REALLY YOU JUST PULLED THAT OUT FOR HER FINGER. NO I DIDN'T DUDE. NO I DIDN'T. WILL YOU MARRY ME? (SCREAMS) WE HAVE A PROPOSAL. OUR FIRST PROPOSAL ON ART MANN PRESENTS. AND SHE SAID YES, (SCREAMS)

SHE SAID YES. SHE SAID YES! CONGRATULATIONS. -THANKS MAN THANKS FOR DOING THAT ON OUR SHOW HEY THANKS, I LOVE YOU MAN THANK YOU I LOVE YOU GUYS. DID YOU THINK THAT HE WOULD PROPOSE TO YOU RIGHT HERE ON ART MANN PRESENTS? NO! NOT AT ALL (LAUGHS) CAN WE HAVE ANOTHER KISS?

NEVER SHARE A CHECKING ACCOUNT AND ALWAYS TELL THE TRUTH AND TO DO EVERYTHING TOGETHER NOW MATTER HOW SIMPLE. NEVER SHARE A CREDIT CARD TOGETHER ALWAYS GO TO NIOSA TOGETHER. AND AS MUCH SEX AS POSSIBLE. HOW LONG HAVE YOU BEEN TOGETHER? WE'VE BEEN DATING FOR ABOUT A YEAR AND A HALF NOW AND I AM (CRYING) EASY. WE GOTTA BE HERE I JUST (LAUGHS) (CRYING) -THIS IS AWESOME YOU SEE HE IS JUST SO PREPARED. HE JUST KNOWS ME. YOU THINK BACK ABOUT THE TIME THAT HE ASKED YOU YOUR GOING TO REMEMBER THE GOOFY T.V. GUY THAT WAS STANDING THERE WRECKING THE WHOLE MOMENT FOR YOU. IN ADVANCE, I'M GOING TO APOLOGIZE. IT'S FIESTA WELCOME TO NIOSA, SAN ANTONIO ART MANN RULES! NO OFFENSE TO ANY OF THE FOOD I'VE EATEN TODAY BUT I MAY THROW UP. I HAVE EATEN FRIED CHEESECAKE FROGS AND SNAILS (INDISCERNIBLE) YOU GOTTA KEEP IT SIMPLE. GORDITAS, CHICKEN FAJITAS. YOU KNOW KEEP IS SIMPLE AND WE'RE DOING IT FOR THE RED CROSS. AND EVERY YEAR DO YOU COME UP WITH A DIFFERENT THEME. -ACTUALLY THIS HAT HAS BEEN IN THE WORKS FOR ABOUT SIX YEARS NOW SO THIS YEAR I ADDED THE BUTTERFLIES. I THINK I BOUGHT EVERY BUTTERFLY I COULD FIND IN SAN ANTONIO HOW'S IT FEEL FOR YOU GUYS TO BE IN HIGH DEFINITION. WHAT'S IT FEEL LIKE RIGHT NOW. I'M FEELING VERY EXPOSED. HIGH DEFINITION ROCKS. ALL I GOT TO SAY IS MARK CUBAN ROCKS. SENOR MARIPOSA AT NIOSA YOU DOWN HERE AT NIOSA THIS IS ONLY FIVE DAYS OF A 14 DAY EVENT. IT'S ALMOST LIKE A MARDI GRAS THAT CUTS OFF ABOUT 10:30, THAT'S THE ONLY BAD PART.

YOU CLEARLY ARE AN EXCELLENT SCREAMER. -YES I AM. WHAT ADVICE DO YOU HAVE TO PEOPLE. WE'LL LOOK IN SLOW MOTION AT YOUR WORK. NOW WALK US THROUGH THIS. WHAT ADVICE DO YOU HAVE FOR PEOPLE IF THEY WANT TO SCREAM ON CAMERA. BECAUSE YOUR BRILLIANT AT IT. WHAT YOU GOTTA DO IS TAKE A REALLY DEEP BREATH IN AND JUST LET IT ALL OUT SHOW ME ONE MORE TIME (SCREAMS)

I SEE A LOT OF FOOD, A LOT OF BOOZE. YEAH IT'S GREAT UM, LOTS OF PEOPLE AND YOUNG, I LIKE THAT, SMILING FACES. EXACTLY. LOTS OF BOOZE WHOOO HOO CAN YOU EXPLAIN THIS SAN ANTONIO HAPPINESS THAT I SEE EVERYWHERE? WELL YOU SEE IT STARTS WITH A LOT OF BEER. (LAUGHS) THIS MAN HAS THE NEW SLOGAN FOR SAN ANTONIO HEY, WE GOT BITCHES ALL DAY SAN ANTONE TWO TIER BABY HOLD IT DOWN BABY.

WHERE ARE YOU GUYS FROM? WHAT'S YOUR STORY? -ANTHONY, NEW MEXICO -EL PASO, TEXAS -CHIHUAHUA, MEXICO DID WE DRIVE IN HERE JUST FOR THIS. I DID TODAY FROM DALLAS, I'M GOING TO SCHOOL IN DALLAS. HEY WHAT'S UP NIOSA 07 OH HERE WE GO..TONGUE ACTION. WE NEED SOME SLANG FOR WHEN SOMEONE GETS DRUNK YOU KNOW LIKE WHEN THEY'RE HAMMERED ENEBRIOS, Y TAMOS PEDOS, Y TAMOS AHUMAU (SCREAMS) ESTA MOS BORRACHOS WE HEARD THAT ONE, THAT'S STINKY RIGHT? WHERE ARE YOU GUYS FROM? WE'RE FROM HERE. BORN IN SAN ANTONIO TELL PEOPLE ABOUT HOW YOU WERE FIRST EXPOSED TO THIS EVENT. WE'RE YOU A SMALL KID? UH, ACTUALLY LAST YEAR. -REALLY? YEAH, LAST YEAR. -I BEEN DOING THIS SINCE I WAS F# # # KN LITTLE. (LAUGHS) I BEEN GETTING DRUNK SINCE I WAS 11. WHY WOULD YOU WANT ME IN THE FRAME. WE COULD CROP ME OUT MAYBE BECAUSE YOU'RE THE MAN -ART MANN THIS IS THE PLACE TO HAVE FUN, GET DRUNK AND HAVE SEX. (LAUGHS) WE'RE OFF TO THE WESTIN (LAUGHS) YOUR IN HIGH DEFINITION -AND WE'RE IMPROVING INTERRACIAL RELA-TION-SHIPS (LAUGHS) HE'S AFRICAN AMERICAN AND I'M FILIPINA AND CZECHOSLOVAKIAN EVERYONE IS HAVING A GOOD TIME. JUST LOOK AT THIS, C'MON SHOW EM. HERE WE GO.

THE MORE CUPS THAT YOU HAVE THE BETTER OFF YOU HAVE I GOTTA BE HONEST WITH YOU GIRLS. I AM LIKING YOUR CITY. IT'S AWESOME. YEAH -IT'S A BEAUTIFUL CITY. GIVE THE PEOPLE AT HOME A LIST OF THINGS THAT WE LIKE ABOUT SAN ANTONIO OH THERE ARE SO MANY THINGS, THE CULTURE, THE DANCING, THE MUSIC YOU'VE BEEN DRINKING A LITTLE. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENED, ALL RIGHT NIOSA STARTED IN 1906 1906 UH, HONESTLY THERE WEREN'T THIS MANY TREES. THERE WEREN'T MANY TREES. IS THIS FIESTA FASHION? WOULD YOU DRESS ALL COLORFUL LIKE THIS IN SAN ANTONIO THAT'S FIESTA STUFF RIGHT? YEAH IT'S FIESTA. -I HAD A SOMBRERO BUT I GAVE IT AWAY. THE HISTORY, HELP HIM OUT A LITTLE THE HISTORY OF NIOSA WELL IT'S NIGHTS IN OLD SAN ANTONIO (SCREAMS) CAN WE SEE SOME ATTITUDE CATWALK ACTION RIGHT HERE OUT OF YOU TWO

THIS IS IT, THAT WAS A FULL SHOW, WE HAD LOTS OF RANDOM SCREAMING TONS OF FOOD EATING AND JUST OVERALL GOOD TIMES. SAN ANTONIO HAPPY, FRIENDLY PLACE. YOU WILL SEE THAT IF YOU HAVEN'T BEEN HERE YET AND YOU COME DOWN HERE, YOU WILL MEET LOTS OF HAPPY, FRIENDLY PEOPLE. SO KUDOS TO THEM AND THANKS TO YOU GUYS FOR WATCHING OUR SHOW WHAT A GREAT TIME THIS IS. SO I'LL SEE YOU NEXT WEEK. I'M GOING TO TEASE THE NEXT EPISODE, WE'RE OFF TO ALABAMA TO WATCH DRUNK PEOPLE THROW FISH. THAT'S A TEASE RIGHT THERE. YOU LIKE THAT. SO SEND US EMAILS, WE LOVE THAT. YOUR GIVING US GREAT IDEAS THIS RIGHT HERE WAS UH THE RESULT OF A LOT OF EMAILS, PEOPLE SAID WE HAD TO CHECK THIS OUT AND SO THERE YOU GO, WE DID IT. BUT YOU KNOW WHAT I WANT TO THROW THIS OUT THERE IF YOU HAVE A CRAZY WEDDING COMING UP, INVITE US TO THAT, I THINK THAT WOULD BE A GOOD SHOW. RIGHT? UH OH, WE GOT SOME DRUNKS. DUDE THAT IS THE BEST SHIRT I'VE EVER SEEN. WE WERE JUST DOING THE CLOSE TO OUR SHOW. DO YOU REALIZE WHO HE IS? HE'S A F# # KING WRESTLER ART MANN -VIVA LA BAM YOU'VE GOT TO SHOW US THAT SHIRT. SHOW YOU THE SHIRT IT SAYS F# # K ME I'M FAT

WHY IS IT SO HAPPY DOWN HERE, I'M NOT SURE I'M FROM SACRAMENTO, CALIFORNIA AND THIS IS LIKE THE CRAZIEST LIKE TOWN BLOCK PARTY I'VE EVER SEEN IN MY LIFE. RIGHT CAUSE YOU GOTTA SEE THE ALAMO AT NIGHT, OF COURSE WHEN YOUR FROM SAN ANTONIO OF COURSE THE ALAMO IS LIKE YOU KNOW THE COOLEST THING EVER. TELL ME ABOUT THIS GOLDEN PALACE THING. DO YOU GET SOME DOUGH FOR DOING IT? I'M THE FIRST ENTERTAINER EVER IN THE WHOLE WORLD OF ENTERTAINMENT TO ACTUALLY BE THE FIRST ENTERTAINER TO GET THE GOLDEN PALACE TATTOOS I GOT 13 GRAND I LOVE THIS CITY. -I LOVE THIS CITY. SAY GOODBYE TO MY T.V. FRIENDS -BYE