Art Mann Presents...

Episode Number: 303 - TV14

Episode Title: Swamp Buggy Racing

Description: This week we travel to the one place in the world where you can see this unique and bizarre form of racing. Come along and check out the Queen's Mudbath, Sippy Holes, and the Mile O' Mud.

Transcript:

THIS WEEK THREE WORDS FOR YOU. SWAMP BUGGY RACING!

YEAH HA HA HA

WHAT IS THE REDNECK SATURATION RIGHT NOW? 100% REDNECK HEAVEN. PROBABLY 99% THAT IS 100% REDNECK. THIS IS AS HARDCORE AS YOU CAN GET RIGHT THERE. IT'S LIKE A DRAG RACE, A STOCK CAR RACE AND A BOAT RACE ALL MIXED TOGETHER

IT'S CALLED SWAMP BUGGY RACING AND ITS COMING UP RIGHT NOW.

HA, HA, HA YEE HAW WELCOME TO THE SHOW YOU GUYS, WE'RE IN NAPLES, FLORIDA TO CHECK OUT THIS SWAMP BUGGY RACING I MEAN REALLY HOW CAN YOU SAY THOSE THREE WORDS AND NOT WANT TO COME SEE THIS IN PERSON. SOME OF THE THINGS YOU'LL LEARN IN THE NEXT HALF HOUR WE'LL EXPLAIN WHAT THE MILE O MUD IS ALL ABOUT, THE SIPPY HOLE AND THE QUEEN'S MUD BATH.

YOUR LOOKING AT THE SIPPY HOLE RIGHT NOW. IT'S JUST A BIG DEEP PART. IT'S LIKE A HOLE OF DOOM.

TELL US ABOUT THE SWAMP. THE SWAMP BUGGY RACES ORIGINALLY STARTED IN NAPLES, OBVIOUSLY THE RACING ORIGINALLY STARTED BACK IN THE 1920S WHERE HUNTERS JUST WANTED TO HAVE FUN BEFORE HUNTING SEASON STARTED SO THEY SAID MY BUGGY CAN GET THROUGH THE EVERGLADES BETTER THAN YOUR BUGGY CAN. AND EVENTUALLY PEOPLE WERE TRYING TO BE ABLE TO DO BETTER THAN THE GUY BEFORE HIM THAT ALWAYS DID THE BEST AND IT BECAME OFFICIAL IN 1949 SO IT'S A 58 YEAR OLD TRADITION AND IT'S BEEN GREAT EVER SINCE AND IT'S BEEN SO MUCH FUN, A BIG PART OF MY LIFE, SO COME ON OUT.

IF YOU WANT TO TALK ABOUT VARIETY, YOU JUST SAW THAT CRAZY MACHINE, LOOK AT THIS THING, I GOTTA LEARN ABOUT THE SKINNY TIRES, THEY ALL SEEM TO BE RUNNING THESE CRAZY SKINNY TIRES. I THINK I WOULD HAVE APPROACHED IT DIFFERENTLY I'M NOT DOUBTING, I'M SURE THESE GUYS KNOW WHAT THEY'RE DOING, I'M JUST SAYING IF I WAS A ROOKIE GOING INTO THIS, I'D PUT SOME BIG OL FAT TIRES ON IT AND I WOULD PROBABLY FAIL MISERABLY I DON'T KNOW IF YOU TAKE THIS FOR GRANTED DUDE BUT THIS IS SOME CRAZY SH# T YOUR DOING RIGHT HERE. YEAH IT'S NOT TOO BAD BUT IT'S FUN. LET'S SAY I WANT TO GET INTO THIS HOW MUCH CAN I EXPECT TO SPEND TO GET STARTED. THIS IS ONE OF THE CHEAPEST HOBBIES, ABOUT 3-5 THOUSAND. SERIOUSLY YEAH. I DON'T KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT WHAT I'M LOOKING AT SO PLEASE WALK ME THROUGH THIS. JUST GIVE ME SOME OF THE TECHNICAL FEATURES OF THIS THING. IT'S GOT A CHEVROLET BIG BLOCK. NICE. THERE IS ABOUT 850-900 HORSE POWER REALLY? YEAH THEY RUN, IT'S GOT AN ACTUAL LIKE GEAR SYSTEM ON YOUR CAR DOES AND IT COMES OUT HERE TO LIKE THERE IS ACTUALLY LIKE TRACTOR GEARS AND IT LOWERS SO YOU CAN SPIN THE BIGGER TIRES

THAT MY FRIENDS IS THE SIPPY HOLE AND IT'S SWALLOWED HIM UP SWALLOWED HIM UP WHOLE.

I'M CHECKING OUT THE STAY BACK AT LEAST 10 FEET FROM THE FENCE YOU SEE THAT. WE'VE BEEN STANDING ON THE FENCE. I JUST NOTICED THE SIGN.

I MENTIONED EARLIER I WAS GOING TO TELL YOU GUYS ABOUT THE MILE OF MUD WELL IT'S PRETTY OBVIOUS, THAT'S THE MILE OF MUD. IT'S NOT REALLY A MILE BUT I GUESS IT'S A SOUTHERN MILE. MY DUTIES ARE BREAKFAST IN THE MORNING AND DUCT TAPE ALL DAY LONG. SHOW THEM THE DUCT TAPE ON THIS WHAT IS THIS FEEL LIKE CAUSE WE CAN'T ALL DO THIS WELL YOU COME BACK IN A LITTLE BIT I ONLY MADE MY FIRST RUN 5 MINUTES AGO. TELL US WHAT THE SIPPY HOLE IS ALL ABOUT. THE SIPPY HOLE ORIGINALLY AN OLD TIMER FROM MISSISSIPPI AND EVERYBODY CALLED HIM SIPPY SIPPY MORRIS COULD NEVER MAKE IT THROUGH THE HOLE, SO THEY EVENTUALLY NAMED IT AFTER HIM. THIS WAS IN THE 50S. THIS IS THE COCKPIT OF ONE OF THE WINN INGEST BUGGIES OUT HERE. BASICALLY YOU'VE GOT SIMPLE START IGNITION, FUEL, FAN TACHOMETER. GIMME A QUICK DESCRIPTION OF WHAT I AM LOOKING AT RIGHT HERE. THIS IS A V6. IT'S BEEN BORED AND MODIFIED. IT COMES OUT OF LIKE A CHEVY BLAZER AND IT'S A TWO SPEED TRANSMISSION WITH I DON'T KNOW WHAT KIND OF REAR END THIS IS. THIS IS A FABRICATED REAR END 9 INCH FORD BUT IT HAS PLANTARIES ON IT. WE TRACK EVERYTHING OFF, IF YOU NOTICE THE FRAME IS OFFSET JUST A LITTLE BIT TO KEEP THE WEIGHT TO THE INSIDE OF THE TRACK BECAUSE IT WANTS TO FLIP ON YOU WHEN WE GET GOING SO FAST SO THERE IS A LOT OF ENGINEERING INVOLVED. LOOKS LIKE A MOTOCROSS TIRE ON THE FRONT. THAT'S EXACTLY WHAT THESE ARE YAMAHA YZ 80 TIRES THERE ARE FIVE OF THEM ON THERE. WE CUT THEM, AND STRETCHED THEM OUT. I GOTTA SEE THIS, WHAT IS THE OFFICIAL FOOD OF SWAMP BUGGY RACING? SAUSAGE GRAVY ON BREAD. SAUSAGE GRAVY? ON BREAD. YOU DRIVE BAREFOOT, IS THAT YOUR STORY? YOUR CLAIM TO FAME. WELL I DROVE BAREFOOT ALL THE YEARS THAT I DROVE, TURNED THE BUGGY OVER TO HIM ABOUT FOUR YEARS AGO WHAT'S THE THEORY WITH THE BAREFOOT, IT JUST FEELS RIGHT? CAUSE YOUR IN THE SWAMP. I DON'T WANT TO GET MY SHOES WET. I HAVE NEVER SEEN THIS, I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHAT THAT IS. THAT'S BOIL PEANUTS. YOU EVER HAD ONE? NO. NEVER.

OH WOW IT'S ALL SOFT LIKE A BAKED BEAN. THAT THING IS A LITTLE CRAZY TOO, WHAT IS THAT WALLPAPER? YEAH IS IT EXCLUSIVE TO GET THIS CLOSE? A LITTLE DANGEROUS TOO NO? YEAH THERE IS A SIGN OVER THERE THAT SAYS 10 FEET AWAY FROM THE FENCE. BUT WE CAN'T READ. (LAUGHS) DID WE SEE SOME ACCIDENTS, WE'LL SEE SOME CRASHING. YEAH WE HAD A JEEP ROLLED OVER OVER THERE ON THE THIRD TURN YESTERDAY. WHERE DO YOU GET THESE TIRE? YOU MAKE EM. HOW DOES A GUY MAKE A TIRE? PRETEND YOUR TALKING TO AN IDIOT CAUSE YOU ARE. WELL, (LAUGHS) THESE TIERS HERE I HAD THE CIRCLES MADE AT A WELDING SHOP AND THE HOLES PREDRILLED IN EM. AND THEN I TOOK A 900 MILITARY TIRE, THAT'S ALL I DID IS A REGULAR STREET 900 MILITARY TIRE AND TAKE AND PUT THESE PLATES, ONE ON EACH SIDE AND START SQUEEZING THEM TOGETHER AND I PUT ROPE, SHIP ROPE, ITS ABOUT THAT BIG A ROUND ON THE INSIDE OF IT TO KEEP THEM FROM MASHING DOWN. AND JUST SQUEEZED THEM ALL TOGETHER GRADUALLY.

IF I WERE GOING TO ENTER INTO THIS, I WOULD THINK MAYBE A FAT TIRE, WHY DOES A SKINNY TIRE WORK? BECAUSE IT DIGS DOWN INTO THE GROUND. THE REGULAR STREET TIRES FULL OF AIR TEND TO FLOAT WHEN YOUR GOING THROUGH THAT HOLE. AND THEY SPIN, YOU DON'T GET DOWN. THESE GO RIGHT STRAIGHT DOWN AND DIG IN.

DO NOT GO AWAY MY FRIENDS, WE'LL HAVE MORE SWAMP BUGGY RACING RIGHT AFTER THE BREAK, OH HE'S CAUGHT IN THE SIPPY HOLE.

HE'S OUT WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK.

WELCOME BACK TO THE SHOW YOU GUYS, I LOVE THIS. AH, WE'RE IN NAPLES, FLORIDA. WE'RE ENJOYING SOME SWAMP BUGGY RACING AND A LOT OF FUN PEOPLE TO TALK TO THIS IS RIGHT UP MY ALLEY. I'M A HUGE REDNECK MYSELF AND I LIKE NICE WEATHER SO, IT REALLY HAS ALL I NEED. C'MON LET'S GO FIND SOME MORE. LOOK AT THIS. NOTICE THE ACCESS, I DON'T MEAN TO KEEP POINTING IT OUT, BUT WE ARE RIGHT ON THE TRACK. I WANTED TO SHOW YOU GUYS UP CLOSE WHAT WE ARE DEALING WITH HERE WITH THE SWAMP. TAKE A LOOK. SHOW THEM THE MURKY WATER. THAT IS SWAMP BUGGY RACING. THE OTHER CHANNELS WONT DO THAT. YOU KNOW THEY JUST SHOW IT FROM AFAR. CAMERAMEN ARE ON THEIR LITTLE STANDS AND STUFF. NOT THIS SHOW.

WE GOT A TACO IN THE BAG WHICH IS FRITO CORN CHIPS, TACO MEAT, CHEESE, LETTUCE, SALSA, SOUR CREAM, JALAPE}OS IF YOU WANT IT. I DON'T MEAN TO GET ALL WEIRD, BUT I THOUGHT CAUSE YOU KNOW LIKE THE LITTLE SPEEDOS GUYS WEAR OH MY GOD. YEAH THEY CALL THEM A BANANA HAMMOCK I THOUGHT TACO IN A BAG WAS ONE OF THOSE SLANGS FOR THAT TOO, YOU KNOW. (LAUGHS) COULD BE. WELL DONKEY TAIL IS AN ALL BEEF KOSHER FRANK, WE SPLIT IT, WE PUT SHREDDED CHEESE IN IT, TAKE A FLOUR TORTILLA WRAP IT AND PUT IT IN A SOY BEAN OIL AND FRY IT UP. YOU'VE GOTTA FRY IT. YOU'VE GOTTA FRY IT.

WE HAVE BEEN FINDING SOME REALLY INTERESTING FOOD AS WE WANDER AROUND HERE. WHAT ARE THOSE? THESE ARE SMOKED TURKEY LEGS. WHAT ABOUT GATOR, DO YOU HAVE GATOR HERE? WE GOT GATOR TATERS WELL THOSE ARE FRIED TATERS IDAHO TATERS BUT WHEN YOU PUT IT IN THERE AND FRY IT THEY OPEN UP AND CRAWL ROUND LIKE A GATOR THAT'S AWESOME. SEE HOW IT CRAWLS AROUND LIKE A GATOR. I REALLY HAVE AN EATING PROBLEM BECAUSE I'M JUST LOOKING AT THAT WITH A HUGE SMILE. THAT JUST LOOKS LIKE SEE WE KEEP BRINGING IT TOGETHER SO IT GETS ON A PLATE. IT'S A BEAUTIFUL HAT. WELL I SELL BEER FOR GOD SAKES, WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO DO? YOU KNOW THERE YOU GO NOW YOU CAN PUT VINEGAR ON IT, YOU GOT SOME OF THAT GATOR SEASONING UP THERE WE ALREADY, WE'RE BORDERLINE GETTING FIRED EVERY WEEK AS IT IS, I THINK IF WE'RE BOOZING IT UP IT'LL PUT YOU OVER THE TOP. DON'T WORRY ABOUT IT. I'M LOOKING AT THIS GOING HOW AM I GOING TO EAT THIS WHOLE PLATE OF DELICIOUS TATERS, DON'T WORRY GLEN IS ABOUT 5 FEET FROM ME. (LAUGHS)

WELL UH (LAUGHS) THESE ARE REALLY GOOD. WE'RE TALKING ABOUT ALL THE GREAT FOOD YOU CAN GET HERE. MAN JALAPE}O PEPPERS, NACHOS, CHILI

I JUST WANT TO SHOW YOU DOING A LITTLE CSI, WE STUMBLED ONTO SOMETHING RANDOM BONE. TAKE A LOOK. WE'RE NOT SURE WHAT IT IS, TRY NOT TO DRAW TOO MUCH ATTENTION TO IT, DON'T WANT TO ALARM ANYONE. LOOKS LIKE A FEMUR MAYBE, RIGHT? SO YOU CAN GO FOR A RIDE ON THESE THINGS AND GET A LITTLE TOUR JUST A LITTLE TOUR.

TELL THEM WHAT SWAMP BUGGY RACING IS ALL ABOUT. THIS IS NAPLES IN ITS FINEST RIGHT HERE. EVERYBODY THAT COMES HERE LOVES NAPLES, LOVES SWAMP BUGGIES, EVERYONE HERE IS BORN AND RAISED HERE, SWAMP BUGGIES RULE.

SO IF YOUR WONDERING WHAT THE SIPPY HOLE IS, THAT IS THE SIPPY HOLE. SHE IS ACTUALLY STUCK IN IT RIGHT NOW AND WITH THIS FORM OF RACING, YOU KNOW WITH OTHER RACING YOU'LL THROW OUT THE YELLOW FLAG AND THE OTHER COMPETITORS GO SLOW IF YOUR IN THE MIDDLE OF THE RACE COURSE. THERE AIN'T NO YELLOW FLAGS HERE. TAKE A LOOK AT THE FLAT MAN. I SEE GREEN AND I SEE CHECKERED. THAT RED FLAT BY THE WAY IS JUST A DECORATION. I HAVEN'T SEEN HIM TOUCH THAT. NO YELLOWS. SO I LIKE THAT.

HERE COMES THE TRACTOR TO TAKE CARE OF BUSINESS.

I LOVE THAT SHIRT. YUP JOHN BEER. SEE HERE. ANYTIME THERE IS RACING, THERE'S GOTTA BE BOOZE. YOU KNOW IT. BUD LIGHT, GOTTA HAVE EVERYTHING ELSE C'MON DOWN. WHAT YOUR LOOKING AT IS THE JEEP CLASS MAKING THEIR WAY OUT INTO THE SWAMP THE MILE O MUD. HERE IS WHY I LIKE THIS CLASS, YES IT'S A LITTLE SLOWER THAN THE OTHER CLASSES BUT THAT IS SOME RACING RIGHT THERE. LIKE THEY WERE TELLING US AT THE PIT AREA, THAT'S BUMPING, THAT'S BATTLING IT INTO THAT FIRST TURN. THAT'S LOOKING OVER AND SEEING THE LOOK IN YOUR OPPONENT'S EYES. HERE COMES THE SIPPY HOLE IN 3, 2, AHHHH SIPPY HOLE. THAT'S AWESOME. WHAT I'VE FIGURED OUT, BECAUSE I'M SO SMART. I FIGURED OUT THAT THE RACE IS REALLY FROM THE START TO THAT FIRST TURN. IF YOU GET INTO THAT FIRST TURN AS THE LEADER YOU CAN HANG ONTO THAT INSIDE LANE, HUGE ADVANTAGE HERE AT THE MILE O MUD. I SEE SOME FUNNY COLORED SMOKE COMING OUT OF THAT OTHER ONE. OH IT'S ALL ABOUT THE SIPPY HOLE. HE'S GOING TO TAKE EM.

IN NASCAR THE DRIVERS HAVE A SEPARATE AREA, RIGHT? YOUR JUST RIGHT IN HERE. I'M HERE WITH THE FAMILY MAN.

I GOT SPRAYED MAN INEXPERIENCE FOR ME. BUT IT WONT HAPPEN NEXT RACE. WHAT DOES THAT MEAN? HE CUT IN FRONT OF ME AND I GOT WATER IN MY FACE AND I COULDN'T BREATH. I HAD TO LET OFF SO I COULD SEE AND BREATHE. SO THAT IS AN ACTUAL TECHNIQUE GUYS WILL USE? YEAH. I WAS TOLD TO DO IT TO HIM IF I GOT IN FRONT OF HIM. (LAUGHS)

TELL US WHAT AREA ARE WE IN CAUSE WE'VE BEEN DOWN IN THE PIT AREA COVERING ALL THAT YOUR ON THE CORNER OF BAMBOOZER PLACE AND 69 SWAMP BUGGY WAY. (LAUGHS) WHAT'S OUR STORY OVER HERE? WE GONNA KEEP A BUZZ ON FOR YA. (LAUGHS)

WE ARE A TRAVEL SHOW. WE LIKE TO SHOW EVERYONE, WE GIVE EM SOME TIPS, SOME ADVICE ON WHAT THEY NEED TO BRING TO AN EVENT. BEER. THAT'S WHAT I'M SAYING GIMME A LIST RIGHT NOW OF WHAT PEOPLE NEED TO BRING TO THE SWAMP BUGGY RACES.

THAT'S IT? THAT'S IT. AW YOU MIGHT WANT TO GET A SANDWICH EVERY ONCE IN AWHILE.

AS A KID I HAD A VAN, I WOULD DRIVE AROUND MY YARD, SO I'M QUALIFIED TO VENTURE INTO THIS TERRITORY THAT IS 100% REDNECK. THAT'S AS HARDCORE AS YOU CAN GET RIGHT THERE BROTHER. A LIFTED THUNDERBIRD? IT DON'T GET ANY BETTER THAN THAT RIGHT THERE.

THAT IS A BOOZE PROFESSIONAL. WHAT DO YOU HAVE THERE? I HAVE VODKA AND GATORADE. JUST LIKE ANY GOOD EVENT, BOOZE IS A BIG PART OF IT. YES IT IS BUT I STAY SOBER THE ENTIRE TIME. I'M MODERATION YES. WE HAVE MODERATION. MODERATELY SOBER.

(CHEERS) HEY IT'S NOT THAT KIND OF SHOW. OH OKAY. (LAUGHS)

TELL ME ABOUT THAT TATTOO ON YOU NECK MY FRIEND. WHAT DO YOU WANT TO KNOW. JUST TELL ME ABOUT IT. IT HURT. (LAUGHS) THAT'S A FAN RIGHT THERE. YOU KNOW BAG DAN THE CENTER FOR THE PATRIOTS, HE WATCHES OUR SHOW. YOU SEE THAT BIG DAN YEAH

WHAT ARE WE LOOKING AT RIGHT HERE. THIS IS A 91 THUNDERBIRD ON AN 83 BRONCO FRAME THIS A THUNDER BIRD ON THE BRONCO CHASSIS. THIS IS 100%, I MEAN YOU CANNOT GET REDDER THAN THAT. AM I RIGHT? NO. WITH THE PAINT JOB ON IT, THERE AIN'T NO WAY. LOOK AT THAT. IT DON'T GET MORE REDNECK THAN THAT. YOU HAVE TO TAKE A LOOK AT THIS.

TELL ME ABOUT THE EQUIPMENT YOU HAVE IN HERE. NOT MUCH, IT'S KIND OF SIMPLE.

HOW DO YOU BECOME THE SWAMP BUGGY QUEEN. YOU ENTER A PAGEANT AND OF COURSE THERE IS INTERVIEW, EVENING GOWN, BATHING SUIT AND ON STAGE QUESTIONS. I NOTICE THE ABSENCE, THERE ARE NO MIRRORS. NO SIDE VIEW MIRRORS. HOW DO YOU SEE WHERE THE OTHER GUY IS? I'M HOPING I DON'T NEED NONE.

AND AT THE BEGINNING OF THE SHOW I TOLD THEM I WOULD TEACH THEM ABOUT THE SIPPY HOLE. WE DID. I TOLD THEM I WOULD TEACH THEM ABOUT THE MILE O MUD. WE DID. OKAY. THE THIRD THING WAS I TOLD THEM WE WOULD TEACH THEM ABOUT THE QUEEN'S MUD BATH. SO YOU WANT ME TO TEACH THEM? TELL THEM WHAT THIS IS. THIS IS A TRADITION THAT ACTUALLY STARTED ABOUT 1957 WHERE THE WINNER OF THE BIG FISH WAS THE BIG RACE WINNER OF THE WEEKEND PICKS UP THE QUEEN WHICH WILL BE ME AND GOES RIGHT OUT THERE ON A BUGGY AND PICKS ME UP AND JUMPS INTO THE SIPPY HOLE WITH ME. BONNIE, YOU LOOK LIKE YOUR CLEARLY IN THE ZONE RIGHT NOW. JUST SITTING HERE THINKING ABOUT IT. PLANNING MY RACE. WHAT ARE WE DOING AS WE SIT HERE AND WE GET READY TO RUN, WHAT ARE WE THINKING ABOUT? OH JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW IT'S GOING TO BE OUT THERE ON THE TRACK. IT'S GOING TO BE A SHAME YOU LOOK BEAUTIFUL. YOUR GONNA ARE WE GOING IN THIS GOWN. NO. I HAVE ANOTHER ONE. WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT, THE LINE, WHEN YOUR GONNA ACCELERATE, WHAT ARE YOU THINKING ABOUT, WHAT'S GOING ON INSIDE THERE. JUST GETTING IT SET UP IN MY MIND AND HAVING IT AIMED WHERE IT NEEDS TO BE AIMED AT. HOW MANY TIMES A YEAR DO THEY RUN THESE THINGS THREE TIMES. THREE TIMES A YEAR. A SPECIAL MUD DRESS. KIND OF. CHEAPER DRESS SO IT HELPS. IF IT GETS RUINED IT'S OKAY.

DON'T GO AWAY WE'LL HAVE MORE FROM THE SWAMP BUGGY RACING RIGHT AFTER THE BREAK. LOOK THEM DOWN INTO THE SIPPY HOLE GLUG, GLUG, GLUG, IS IT GLUB, GLUB, GLUB OR GLUG I THINK IT'S GLUB, GLUB, GLUB RIGHT? GLUG? I'M NOT SURE WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK. WE'LL FIGURE THAT OUT. OR NOT.

WELCOME BACK TO THE SHOW YOU GUYS, WE'RE STILL HERE IN NAPLES, FLORIDA WATCHING THIS SWAMP BUGGY RACING. THIS IS PRETTY FUN. WHAT I LIKE ABOUT AN EVENT LIKE THIS LIKE IT'S COOL TO GO TO INDY AND DO THE NASCAR EVENTS AND ALL THAT BUT THE ACCESS YOU GET AT AN EVENT LIKE THIS ADAM SHOW THEM WHERE WE ARE STANDING RIGHT NOW. JUST GO AHEAD.

YEAH IT'S CALLED A DANGEROUS SPOT. ABSOLUTELY SICK. LET'S GO WANDER AROUND. WE JUST HEARD ABOUT A WE HEARD ABOUT TURN 1 I GUESS IT IS, IS WHERE THE PARTY IS AT. THERE ARE PEOPLE WITH ALL SORTS OF CRAZY SCAFFOLDING AND THINGS TO WATCH THE RACE. WE'RE GOING TO GO DOWN THERE AND CHECK THAT OUT. C'MON WITH ME RIGHT NOW. HERE THEY COME AGAIN. THAT'S CRAZY. WE SHOULD NOT BE STANDING HERE, THAT'S ALL I'M GOING TO SAY

HEY SHE WON, THAT'S OUR GIRL. THAT'S BONNIE. SEE NOW IF I WERE SEXY, RIGHT? WHICH I'M NOT. OH C'MON YOU ARE. I WOULD WANT TO BE MISS FLORIDA SPORTS BAR BECAUSE THEN I DON'T HAVE TO GO INTO THAT. NO, I DON'T I DID HAVE TO LAST YEAR THOUGH, THREE TIMES ACTUALLY, ONE OF THOSE TIMES I HAD THE FLU BUT I STILL WENT IN. THESE GUYS ARE ABOUT TO RACE. THIS IS LIKE THE FINAL RACE OF THE DAY. THEY HAVE EVERY CLASS RACING AGAINST EACH OTHER JUST SO THEY CAN HAVE AN OVERALL CHAMPION. THERE THEY GO. AND DON'T FORGET THAT OVERALL CHAMPION GETS TO THROW THE QUEEN INTO THE MUD. SEE ANYTHING CAN HAPPEN HERE. THAT BIG DOG CAN HAVE SOME PROBLEMS

WHAT IS IT LIKE TO TAKE THAT DIP BECAUSE WE'RE ABOUT TO SEE IT. I TEASED THIS EARLIER IN THE SHOW. WE'RE ABOUT TO SEE THE QUEEN'S MUD BATH. WHAT IS THAT LIKE? HONESTLY IT'S PROBABLY THE BEST PART ABOUT BEING QUEEN. I MEAN WHAT OTHER SPORT LETS YOU GET ON A BUGGY AND GO OUT TO THE MIDDLE OF A MUDDY TRACK AND JUMP IN WITH THE WINNER OF A RACE. IT'S AMAZING AND THE CROWD JUST GO CRAZY AS SOON AS YOU ENTER THAT WATER. OH YEAH, IT'S ALMOST AS IF THEY COME OUT JUST TO SEE ME GET THROWN IN THE MUD. HOW DO I KNOW WHEN IT'S OVER. EVERY TIME I TURN AROUND THERE IS ANOTHER RACE. HOW DO YOU KNOW WHEN IT'S OVER? WHEN ALL THE BUGGIES ARE GOING TO JUST STORM UP HERE AND YOU'LL SEE THESE BIG SHINY THINGS CALLED TROPHIES. THANK YOU (LAUGHS) I'M JUST TEASING. (APPLAUSE) YOU KNOW WHAT THIS MEANS DON'T YOU, THE DRIVER OF THAT ROLL ON GETS TO GIVE THE QUEEN A RIDE OUT THERE AND GIVE HER A LITTLE MUD BATH.

(CHEERS) CONGRATULATIONS DAN ON WINNING THE BIG FEATURE.

(APPLAUSE) YOU THE WINNER OF THE BIG FEATURE RIGHT? YES SIR. YOU KNOW WHAT THIS MEANS FOR YOU, WHAT'S ABOUT TO HAPPEN RIGHT? OH YEAH WE'RE GETTING READY TO GET WET ONE MORE TIME. (LAUGHS) THE LIPSTICK ON THE CHEEK, THAT'S A SIGN OF A WINNER. YEAH THAT'S THE SIGN OF A WINNER WHEN YOU GET LIPSTICK ON YOUR CHEEKS. NOW I'M A VIRGIN TO ALL THIS. THIS IS MY FIRST TIME COMING AND SEEING THIS IN PERSON. HERE IS WHAT I'VE OBSERVED. IT SEEMS LIKE THE START IS HUGE YES, VERY HUGE. BUT THE BIGGEST THING IS JUST BEING THE ONE ON THE INSIDE ON THAT FIRST TURN. YEAH THE INSIDE YEAH CUTS ABOUT 3 SECONDS OFF THE RACE SO YOU GOTTA GET TO THAT FIRST CORNER FIRST TO BE ABLE TO PLANT THE CORNERS. IT'S JUST HUGE, IT REALLY IS. I'VE BEEN ASKING PEOPLE ALL DAY AND NO ONE SEEMS TO BE ABLE TO PUT IT IN WORDS WHAT IS IT LIKE TO DRIVE THIS THING? IT'S A RUSH. IT'S JUST A BLAST, LIKE GETTING SHOT OUT OF A ROCKET OUT THERE AND ONCE THE WATER CLEARS YOU CAN SEE WHERE YOUR GOING, THERE IS NOTHING LIKE IT.

(CHEERS) THIS IS IT. WE HAD A GREAT DAY HERE. WEATHER BEAUTIFUL, FANS SHOWED UP WE CAN'T GO AROUND AND THANK EVERYONE PERSONALLY SO YOU GUYS ARE THE REPRESENTATIVES OF AND I AM A RACER EVEN IN THE SLOWEST CLASS, THE JEEP CLASS WE'RE OUT THERE LIKE WE SAID THE ROAD WARRIORS SLOW BUT ENTERTAINING. ENTERTAINING. MY BROTHER. WE FINISHED, WE WEREN'T FIRST BUT WE DID FINISH. I DON'T MEAN TO INTERRUPT, BUT WE ARE INDEED IN THE SOUTH MY FRIEND. THERE YOU GO, THAT IS INDEED IN THE SOUTH. THAT IS CALLED EXHIBIT A. THIS IS WHAT MAKES ME TICK. I'M GOING TO COME BACK NEXT WEEK AND I'M GOING TO SHOW THEM ANOTHER CRAZY EVENT LIKE THIS. CRAZY EVENT, CRAZIER THAN SWAMP BUGGY RACING ? MAYBE. MAYBE BUT I DOUBT IT. I GOTTA KEEP EM ON THE HOOK THOUGH. OKAY KEEP EM ON THE HOOK. BUT I GUARANTEE YOU THIS, THERE WILL BE DRUNK PEOPLE NEXT TIME. WELL THERE HEY WE'RE SOUTHERN. I RECOMMEND THIS EVENT TO YOU GUYS AND I KNOW I'VE SAID THIS BEFORE BUT THIS TRULY IS ONE OF THOSE THINGS IF YOU GET A CHANCE, YOU'VE GOTTA COME DOWN HERE TO NAPLES AND EXPERIENCE FOR YOURSELF. LOOK AT THIS, A LITTLE DIFFERENT THAN THAT SWAMP BUGGY RACING SCENE. THIS IS ONLY 10 MINUTES FROM THERE. THIS IS STILL CONSIDERED NAPLES. AND I WANTED TO SHOW YOU GUYS THIS BECAUSE IT'S HERE AND IT'S BEAUTIFUL. ITS NAPLES BEACHES ARE KNOWN FOR THE WHITE SAND, AND THEN SOMETHING THAT YOU HAVEN'T SEEN BEFORE THAT I'M GOING TO SHOW YOU.

IT'S KNOWN FOR THIS FOAM, IT'S GROTESQUE AND IT LEAVES ME WITH AN UNEASY FEELING. YET SOMEHOW I CAN'T STOP STEPPING IN IT. SO THERE YOU GO ANOTHER SHOW. LOOK AT THE FOAM BEHIND YOU, YOU GOTTA LOOK AT THIS PILE RIGHT HERE. IT LOOKS LIKE A TERRIBLE ACCIDENT AT THE DOVE FACTORY. (LAUGHS) THAT MAN IS GOING TO PASS OUT.

WHOOO (LAUGHS) THAT'S BEAUTIFUL YOU GUYS WANT SOME INFORMATION ON THE SHOW, UPCOMING EPISODES LITTLE CLIPS, WHATEVER ELSE WE HAVE ON THERE GO TO ARTMANN.COM AND DO ME A FAVOR COME BACK NEXT WEEK. WE'LL HAVE MORE CRAZINESS FOR YOU.