Art Mann Presents...

Episode Number: 212 - TV14

Episode Title: The Lake of the Ozarks

Description: This week we accept the invite from viewers Heather and Terry to check out the Midwest's craziest lake. Join us as we cruise the lake in their 42 foot Fountain powerboat. You will also learn why Missouri is called the "Show Me State". Don't let the kids watch this one!

Transcript:

WELCOME TO MISSOURI WELCOME TO MISSOURI

YOU GUYS IS THIS WHAT THEY MEANT ABOUT MISSOURI BEING THE SHOW ME STATE (ALL TALKING) ART'S THEME MUSIC

HEY YOU GUYS HOW YOU DOIN? WELCOME TO THE SHOW WE ARE IN MISSOURI. HEATHER AND TERRY HAVE INVITED US HERE. THEY SENT US A LITTLE EMAIL AND THEY SAID, ART WE SAW YOU GUYS WENT TO LAKE TRAVIS, YOU WENT TO HAVASU, YOU WENT TO PARKER, BUT YOU HAVEN'T SEEN THE WORLDS BIGGEST FLOATING PARTY. IT TAKES PLACE HERE IN MISSOURI. YES, THOSE WERE THEIR WORLDS. THEY SAY THE LAKE OF THE OZARKS IS THE PLACE WE OUGHTA BE. WELL HEATHER AND TERRY, WE'RE ON OUR WAY TO SEE YOU.

THEY SENT US PICTURES YOU GUYS, IT'S KINDA SICK.

LAKE OF THE OZARKS BABY

WE ARE HERE. THAT IS LAKE OF THE OZARKS OVER HERE HEATHER AND TERRY THAT I'VE BEEN TELLING YOU GUYS ABOUT. HI. HOW YOU GUYS DOIN? GREAT. NOW TELL THEM WHY YOU SENT US THE EMAIL, WHY YOU WANTED US TO COME HERE. BECAUSE I THOUGHT IT WAS BETTER THAN HAVASU AND LAKE TRAVIS. I LIKE THE CONFIDENCE. WHAT MAKES THIS PLACE BETTER THAN THEM. IT'S BIGGER, THE BOATS ARE BIGGER, PEOPLE ARE CRAZIER. PEOPLE ARE CRAZIER. NOW WHAT IS THIS CALLED WHERE WE'RE GOING TO THE WHOLE LAKE IS LAKE OF THE OZARKS. LAKE OF THE OZARKS PARTY COVE. PARTY COVE. IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE IN MISSOURI. ALL RIGHT. I'M READY, YOU GUYS READY? LET'S GO.

TERRY HOLD ON A SECOND, TELL US WHAT WE'RE ABOUT TO GET ON. THAT'S A BIG DOG. WE'RE GETTING ON A 42 FOUNTAIN OF LIGHTNING UH, TWIN 454 SUPERCHARGED 525 HORSE WE'RE GONNA ROCK AND ROLL DOWN THAT LAKE.

TELL ME ABOUT THIS LAKE, WHERE IS IT LOCATED. IT'S BASICALLY IN THE MIDDLE OF MISSOURI. WELL IS SOMEONE WANTS TO COME TO IT, HOW FAR IS IT AWAY FROM KANSAS CITY, FROM ST. LOUIS. IT'S ABOUT 3 HOURS FROM KANSAS CITY, ABOUT 3-1/2 HOURS FROM ST. LOUIS. IT'S GOT OVER 1300 MILES OF SHORELINE. THIS IS THE #1 LIKE VACATION DESTINATION IN MISSOURI? I THINK IT'S IN THE TOP 5 IN AMERICA ACTUALLY. I HEAR SOME PEOPLE SAYING THERE IS ANOTHER WAY TO SAY MISSOURI. I SAY MISSOURI BUT IF YOUR FROM HERE, YA GIMME THAT. MISSOURA

IT'S MISSOURI. YOU GUYS SAY MISSOURA OR MISSOURI. I SAY MISSOURI BECAUSE MISSOURI ARE THE HOTTEST GIRLS ON THE PLANET.

THIS IS A BIG DOG, ARLO YOU SEE THE FRONT OF THIS THING? IT'S LIKE 20 MILES OUT THERE. GIMME THE BOAT STATS. 42 FEET LONG WEIGHS 9100 POUNDS. WHAT IF I WANT TO GO GET ONE OF THIS, HOW MUCH MONEY SHOULD I BRING WITH ME? ABOUT 300 GRAND. HE DID BUY THIS BOAT FROM ME. IF YOUR MOTORING AROUND A LAKE ON SOME LITTLE LIKE SEADOO OR SOMETHING, TAKE A LOOK AT THE VIEW THIS GUY HAS, YOU MIGHT NOT WANT TO CUT IN FRONT OF HIM. THAT BIG OLD DOG IS HANGING OUT IN FRONT OF US. YES IT IS. I DID UH, DID WILD ON FOREVER AND A LOT OF PEOPLE THAT WATCH THAT ARE COLLEGE STUDENTS, RIGHT. SO A LOT OF THEM DON'T EVEN HAVE JOBS, WE DO THIS HIGH DEF SHOW, A LOT OF THE EMAILS WE GET, THEY HAVE TOYS LIKE YOU GUYS HAVE. I LIKE THIS AUDIENCE. HEY YOU GOT SOME CRAZY TOYS, SOME CRAZY PLACE TO INVITE US TO, WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU WATCHING T.V. FOR RIGHT NOW. YOU SHOULD BE SENDING THE EMAIL.

WE COULDN'T SHOW YOU GUYS WHAT JUST HAPPENED BECAUSE WE WERE GOING TOO FAST, WE WOULD HAVE LOST THAT CAMERA.

WE'RE WE GOING THAT FAST? HOW FAST WERE WE GOING? AM I CUCKOO? DUDE LOOK AT YOUR HAIR? 60, 65 WE WE'RE BACK THERE UH, YOU GUYS COULDN'T SEE US YOUR LOOKING FORWARD BUT THE THREE OF US WERE LIKE THIS. JUST LOOKING FOR SOMETHING TO HOLD ONTO. I TOLD YOU THERE WERE BARS TO HOLD ONTO. YEAH IT DOESN'T SEEM LIKE ENOUGH.

WHAT'S UP YOU GUYS? WHAT'S GOING ON? PARTY COVE WE'RE GOING WILD LAKE OF THE OZARKS BABY

WE WANT TO SHOW YOU THIS? CAN WE? YOU GUYS ARE SELLING STUFF, WHAT DO YOU HAVE ON THIS BOAT? ICE. PARTY COVE'S THE BEST!

SANDWICHES, TURKEY OR HAM AND EVERYTHING YOU COULD EVER WANT.

TELL US ABOUT THIS PLACE FOR PEOPLE WHO HAVEN'T BEEN HERE BEFORE, TELL EM WHAT IT'S LIKE. OKAY YOU BETTER BE SINGLE WHEN YOU COME HERE FIRST OF ALL. (LAUGHS) YOU GET F# # CKED UP AND NAKED AND RUN AROUND. I ALREADY LOST MY TOP YESTERDAY. THAT'S WHY I GOTTA KEEP THIS ONE ON. YEAH SHE DID. (LAUGHS) I HATE TAN LINES BUT GOD, I GOTTA SHE'S GOTTA HAVE TWO STRAPS ONE ON THE NECK AND ONE ON THE BACK.

IF YOU LIKE TO PARTY A LOT THIS IS DEFINITELY THE PLACE TO COME. YOU JUST KNOW, HUH. YEAH WE JUST KNOW. IF YOU LIKE ASS AND TITTIES AND ALL KINDS OF UM OTHER S# IT THEN YEAH. BASICALLY A GOOD PARTY THEN IT'S LIKE WHOO IT'S A DONE DEAL. I'M VERY IMPRESSED. THANKS YOU GUYS. THANK YOU. HAVE FUN.

EVERYWHERE WE TURN, IT'S JUST ANOTHER ROW OF DEBAUCHERY. IT'S JUST ROW AFTER ROW HERE. SICK LOOK AT IT, ANYWHERE YOU LOOK.

HEY YOU GUYS HAVE SOME KEY, YOU HAVE SOME KEY INGREDIENTS HERE TO A GOOD TIME, WHAT DO YOU DO WITH THAT THING? OH WE MAKE FUN OF PEOPLE GOING AROUND, WE TRY TO GET FRENDLIES COMING IN YOU KNOW. SOMEONE WANTS TO BRING THEIR BOAT HERE, GIMME A LIST CAUSE WE'RE A TRAVEL SHOW, RIGHT. WE LIKE TO HELP PEOPLE OUT A LITTLE. GIMME A LIST OF THINGS THEY SHOULD BRING WITH THEM. BOOBS, BEER, BOOBS, AND BOOBS.

BEER BONG WELL GO AHEAD, I'LL BE RIGHT BACK. THEY JUST SAID RUBBERS. WHERE SHOULD WE GO HERE DESCRIBE THE LAY OF THE LAND. THIS IS THE GAUNTLET. YOU GOTTA GO TAKE A TRIP THROUGH THE GAUNTLET MAN. A LOT OF TITTIES, A LOT OF BEERS, A LOT OF BITCHES.

WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK. WITH MORE

FROM MISSOURI. DON'T GO ANYWHERE.

DON'T GO AWAY, WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK WITH MORE FROM LAKE OF THE OZARKS.

SLIGHTLY CLOUDY WITH A 100% CHANCE OF BOOBS. (LAUGHS)

WELCOME BACK TO THE SHOW YOU GUYS, AT THE BEGINNING OF THE SHOW WERE DRAWING THE OBVIOUS COMPARISONS THAT THIS TRIP WOULD HAVE TO A LAKE TRAVIS FOR EXAMPLE. JUST SO YOU KNOW, JUST AS MUCH FUN, ALL RIGHT, CAUSE I DON'T WANT TO TAKE ANYTHING AWAY FROM TRAVIS BUT THIS IS BIGGER, I'M SORRY. SORRY AUSTIN, TX, I CAN'T SHOW YOU GUYS HOW DEEP THIS GOES. HOW MANY PEOPLE ARE HERE. SAME FUN LOVING CROWD, IT'S STILL ALL ABOUT UH, BEER, UH, AND THEN THE BOOBS SEEM TO BE FLYING EVERYWHERE.

LOOK AT THE BIG UH, INFLATABLE HOG RIGHT THERE, NICE. I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHERE YOU BUY THAT, WHERE DO YOU BUY THAT GLEN?

WHAT'S UP? ART MANN WHAT'S UP?

WHAT UP MAN? LOOK RIGHT THERE.

YOU BETTER PUT ME ON YOUR HD CHANNEL BABY. YOU ARE IN HD RIGHT NOW MY FRIEND. (LAUGHS) HOW DO YOU LIKE IT SO FAR? I'M IMPRESSED WITH HOW MANY PEOPLE ARE HERE.

WE HAD A SHIP SIZE YET? NO. IT'S JUST A SMALL YACHT. GIMME THE STATS ON THIS THING, ON THIS BOAT. THIS YACHT. 40 FOOT LONG, 14-1/2 FOOT WIDE, TWIN 454S 350 HORSE A PIECE. SMOOTH. COSTS $900 TO FILL IT UP. (LAUGHS) IS IT? YEAH. IF YOU FIND A DEAL ON GAS. TELL PEOPLE HOW THIS COMPARES TO HAVASU. HAVASU IS NEAT, IT'S DIFFERENT, THE LAKE DON'T LOOK AS BIG BECAUSE YOU CAN'T HAVE TREES UP TO THE SHORELINE AND THEN YOU CAN SEE 50 MILES PAST THE LAKE, SO IT LOOKS SMALLER. THIS IS, I LIKE THE TREES AND I LIKE THE CHANGES OF THE SEASONS DOWN HERE. THIS FLOATING PARTY IS MORE ORGANIZED THAN HAVASU. THERE ARE LIKE ROWS OF DEBAUCHERY. YEAH, YEAH IT'S MORE COMPACT.

ALL RIGHT MAN TELL ME, WHAT'S YOUR STORY. I'M JUST A CHOREOGRAPHER AND AN ARTIST SIGNED WITH TRACK BOYS. I'VE WORKED WITH EVERYBODY FROM LIKE CHRIS BROWN, USHER, UM MISSY, GENUINE, BIG SHOUT OUT TO HIM, UH NELLY. IS THAT HOW YOU END UP ON THE SICKEST BOAT IN THIS WHOLE LAKE? YEAH ACTUALLY UH ME AND J.E. WE'RE REAL TIGHT, WE'RE ABOUT WORKING TOGETHER. TELL THEM ABOUT LAKE OF THE OZARKS. YOUNG LADIES THE LAKE OF THE OZARKS OH MY GOD, LOOK GOOD SHOT RIGHT THERE, RIGHT THERE PARTY COVE, PARTY COVE. DO YOU SAY MISSOURI OR MISSOURA? MISSOURI. MISSOURI. (LAUGHS) CAUSE I GOTTA GIVE YOU GUYS CREDIT HERE, BECAUSE WE BEEN TO OTHER LAKES LIKE HAVASU AND STUFF AND THESE GUYS JUST PULL IN, THEY SHUT IT OFF AND THEY JUST SOCK ALL THE BOATS IN. YEAH BABY. THIS IS ALL ORGANIZED. THERE'S LIKE STREETS YOU COULD NAME THE STREETS IN HERE. (LAUGHS) YEAH BOAT LANE RIGHT HERE. YOU KNOW ARTIE J, THE ARTIST? (LAUGHS) WHOO WHAT'S GOING DOWN? WHO DO YOU KNOW TO GET INVITED ON HERE? UH, WE DON'T KNOW. I GUESS YOU JUST HAVE TO BE HOT.

SHOW ME THIS TATTOO, THAT'S AMAZING. THE ST. LOUIS SKYLINE. YEAH ST. LOUIS SKYLINE I GOT RIGHT HERE BUT THEN I GOT ON THE BACK TOO. LET'S SEE THAT.

HOW DOES THIS MEMO GO OUT WHERE ALL THE CRAZY HOT GIRLS END UP ON THE SAME BOAT. OH, WHAT DO YOU MEAN ALL THE CRAZY HOT GIRLS, THERE'S HOT GIRLS, THERE'S CRAZY WOMEN EVERYWHERE. THIS IS YOUR BOAT RIGHT? YEAH THIS IS MY BOAT. DUDE, YOU EVER PINCH YOURSELF, THIS IS AMAZING. YEAH YEAH. I MEAN THIS IS LAKE OF THE OZARKS. I MEAN I MEAN LOOK AROUND, IT'S F# # # ING AWESOME OUT HERE. HOW MUCH WOULD THIS COST IF I WANTED TO GET A BOAT LIKE THAT. THIS IS A MILLION DOLLAR YACHT. I GUESS I'M NOT GETTING A BOAT LIKE THAT. HOW DID YOU LEARN ABOUT THIS PARTY ON THE BOAT? I'M FROM MISSOURI, I GREW UP HERE, I'VE BEEN COMING OUT HERE SINCE I WAS LIKE 12. HOW LONG YOU BEEN COMING TO LAKE OF THE OZARKS. THIS IS MY 3RD YEAR. HOW DID YOU DISCOVER THIS, HOW DID YOU HEAR THIS WAS GREAT. ONE OF MY FRIENDS SAID HEY COME DOWN TO LAKE OF THE OZARKS AND LIKE YOU WOULD NEVER EVER EXPERIENCE ANYTHING LIKE IT. I CAME DOWN HERE AND THIS IS MY 2ND BOAT. SOMEONE IS OUT THERE AND THEY'RE GOING OH MAN I DON'T NEED TO GO TO MISSOURI, I CAN GO TO HAVASU, I CAN GO TO LAKE TRAVIS, WHAT WOULD YOU SAY TO THEM? WELL, IF YOU WANT TO GET CRAZY, THIS PLACE IS PROBABLY MORE CRAZY THAN THERE BECAUSE WE GO ALL WINTER LONG IN MISSOURI BECAUSE OF THE WEATHER AND THEN WHEN THE SUN COMES OUT, WE JUST GET, WELL, I SHOULDN'T SAY WE BUT EVERYBODY JUST GOES NUTS. DO YOU HAVE A BOAT HERE SOMEWHERE? YEAH MY BOAT'S RIGHT DOWN THERE. YOU SAID HELL WITH MY BOAT, I'M GOING ON ANOTHER BOAT. YEAH. HEY WHY NOT COME UP ON THE BOAT THAT IS 5 STORIES TALL. THIS ISN'T EVEN A BOAT, THIS IS A CLUB RIGHT NOW. I KNOW IT IS. YOU CAN JUST WALK FROM BOAT TO BOAT TO BOAT TALK TO EVERYBODY. IT'S A BLAST. DOES THE ALCOHOL HELP OR DOES IT HURT WITH THE SEASICKNESS. UH, IT HELPS YES. THIS IS MY, THIS IS MY GOOD FRIEND MANDY. HELLO. SHE'S REALLY HOT. HI. HOW YA DOIN? TELL EVERYONE ABOUT MISSOURI, WHAT MAKES MISSOURI SO GREAT, LAKE OF THE OZARKS. THAT'S ABOUT IT. WHAT? MISSOURI SUCKS BESIDES THE LAKE OF THE OZARKS. LOOK AROUND, CAN YOU JUST DO A LITTLE ACTION RIGHT HERE? LOOK AT THIS. (LAUGHS) WE'VE BEEN TO OTHER LAKE PARTIES OTHER FLOATING PARTIES WELL YOU MIGHT WANT TO GO DEEPER IN BECAUSE YOU MIGHT SEE A LESBIAN EAT ANOTHER LESBIAN'S VAGINA.

CAN YOU JUST COME HERE ANY GIVEN LIKE HOLIDAY WEEKEND? YES, I HEARD IT'S LIKE THIS EVERY HOLIDAY WEEKEND. I GOTTA HAND IT TO THESE PEOPLE CAUSE IT'S NO SECRET THERE IS SOME DRINKING GOING ON, BUT IN THE BOATING WORLD, THERE'S LIKE SOME NEGOTIATING, GET AROUND THESE PLACES, YOU GOTTA BE LIKE SPIDER MAN AND THEY ARE DOIN IT WITH A COUPLE DRINKS IN EM. VERY IMPRESSIVE MISSOURI.

IS THAT YOUR BOAT OVER THERE. YEAH. THAT'S MY COUSIN'S BOAT YEAH. UH WHAT'S GOING ON MAN? I DON'T KNOW MAN PARTY F# # # ING GET NAKED AND GETTING DRUNK. ARLO LOOK AT HER, GET NAKED! RIGHT THERE. YOU KNOW I'M ALWAYS SAYIN I'M A LITTLE WORRIED BECAUSE MY MOM WATCHES THIS SHOW, I THINK SHE SHOULD BE WORRIED THAT HER MOM SEES THE SHOW.

I LOVE NOT HAVING TAN LINES. I CAN, I CAN TELL. THAT'S THE WHOLE POINT OF IT. TAN LINES SUCK. RIGHT. IS THIS TYPICAL OF MISSOURI. IS THIS THE ATTITUDE RIGHT HERE WHERE IT'S JUST LIKE IT'S FREE, IT'S SMILING FACES. IT SHOULD BE THE ATTITUDE. NAKEDNESS SHOULD BE THE ATTITUDE. I DON'T KNOW I THINK THIS GUY MIGHT HAVE A PROBLEM WITH THAT. YOU SEEM OFFENDED SIR. NO, NOT AT ALL. HOW CAN YOU NOT LOVE THIS. IS THIS PARTY COVE IN A NUTSHELL? F# # # ING PARTY COVE IN A NUTSHELL. ALL RIGHT WHAT ARE YOU DOING THERE, I SEE YOU WITH A NIPPLE THERE. I CAN'T HELP IT. IT'S BEAUTIFUL. WE'RE NOT THIS IS MY GIRLFRIEND. THIS ONE'S MINE.

LET ME STEP OUT OF THE FRAME HERE.

YOU KNOW UH, FOR YEARS I KNEW THAT MISSOURI WAS THE SHOW ME STATE, UH, WE LEARNED WHY IT'S CALLED THAT TODAY. HOW DID YOU LEARN THAT? UH, NAKED PEOPLE. DID THEY SHOW YOU? UH, YEAH.

OKAY YOU GUYS WE'RE GOING TO TAKE A QUICK BREAK. I THINK WE COVERED THIS COVE PRETTY GOOD HUH? PARTY PARTY, PARTY. DID YOU SEE LOTS OF DRUNK NAKED STUPID PEOPLE? I HAD NO IDEA MISSOURI WAS SO NAKED. WELL, IT DEPENDS WHAT SECTION YOU GO TO (LAUGHS) WE WENT TO THE NAKED SECTION. ALL RIGHT WHEN WE COME BACK, NIGHT LIFE RIGHT? PARTY. STAY TUNED ART MANN PRESENTS WILL BE RIGHT BACK.

I WATCHED YOU SINCE I'VE GROWN UP BRO. THANKS DUDE. I LOVE YOU MAN. WE'RE HAVING SOME FUN. LAKE HAVASU I SEEN YOU OUT THERE. IT'S LIKE THE OZARKS, WELCOME TO MISSOURI. YEAH. YEEEEES WELCOME BACK YOU GUYS. (INDISCERNIBLE) WE SHOWED THEM PARTY COVE OH YEAH, YEAH. BUT CHECK THIS OUT. NOW WE ARE GOING TO CHECK OUT THE NIGHTLIFE. THE FUN AT LAKE OF THE OZARKS CONTINUES HEATHER AND TERRY HAVE TAKEN OVER THE SHOW. YOU GUYS WHAT ARE WE DOIN NOW? WE'RE PARTYING WE'RE PARTYING (BOTH TALKING) THIS IS HOW WE ROLL AND THERE IS SOMETHING KIND OF SPECIAL ABOUT THIS LAKE THAT WE CAN DO RIGHT? WHAT IS IT? PARTY ON WATER, WE CAN TAKE ALCOHOL OUT OF BARS.

AND WE CAN USE A BOAT TO GET TO ALL THE CLUBS. NO TAXI'S. NO CARS. RIGHT BUT THEN THE DRIVER HAS TO BE SOBER. SO YOU HIRE A DRIVER, THAT'S HOW YOU DO IT. RIGHT? YES, YES. AND THEN WE JUST DO IT ALL NIGHT. RIGHT? ALL NIGHT. AND UH, I DON'T KNOW IF YOU'VE NOTICED BUT UH, HEATHER HAS INVITED LOTS OF HER FRIENDS THEY'RE ALL KIND OF RANDOM PLACES JUST DANCING. WHAT'S THAT? THEY ARE ALL BISEXUAL. A LITTLE BONUS PIECE OF INFORMATION RIGHT AT THE END.

HOW ARE WE GONNA NEGOTIATE OUR WAY TO THESE DIFFERENT CLUBS. ARE WE GOING MILES AND MILES? WHAT'S THE DEAL? UH, USUALLY DOWN HERE IT'S A COUPLE OF MILES TO EACH BAR. SO, DEPENDS ON WHERE YOUR AT. NOW ARE THERE ENOUGH DRUNK BEAUTIFUL WOMEN WITH US TONIGHT? OF COURSE. YOU CAN NEVER HAVE ENOUGH THOUGH. LIKE MONEY AND FREE TIME HUH? OUR FIRST STOP RIGHT HERE IS A LITTLE PLACE CALLED TOPSIDER. THIS IS PRETTY SICK THOUGH THAT YOU CAN JUST PARK RIGHT THERE. CAN YOU SEE THE BOAT FROM HERE? I DON'T KNOW AT NIGHT. SOME OF THE FOLKS ARE CONTENT WITH JUST HANGING OUT ON THE BOATS. SEE THERE'S BOOZE ON THE BOATS. WE'RE GOING TO GO INSIDE, THEY DO SOME CRAZY LIGHT SHOW ON THE DANCE FLOOR HERE AND QUITE FRANKLY I DIDN'T UNDERSTAND WHAT THEY WERE EXPLAINING BUT IN THEIR DEFENSE THEY HAVE BEEN DRINKING A LOT. LET'S GO INSIDE.

HOW LONG HAVE YOU GUYS BEEN IN BUSINESS HERE? A LONG TIME 32 YEARS. WOW! HOW HAS THE CLUB CHANGED IN 32 YEARS. REALLY NOT A LOT. YOU NEED A LITTLE SUNSCREEN THERE SEXY. YOU GUYS DONE FOOL AROUND. I SAW THIS LIGHT SHOW EARLIER, THAT'S CRAZY. YEAH WE KIND OF CAME UP WITH THAT IDEA AND THEN WE TRIED TO CHANGE THAT EVERY YEAR. DESCRIBE THE OUTFIT THAT YOU NEED TO WEAR WHEN YOU GO OUT AT NIGHT HERE. GO AHEAD. CASUAL, CASUAL YET

I DON'T KNOW HEY BABY. HEY HOW ARE YOU? YOU GUYS YOU KNOW WHAT, YOU ARE SOME HAPPY PEOPLE HERE IN MISSOURI. WE JUST LOVE LIFE.

TELL PEOPLE WATCHING ABOUT MISSOURI WOMEN. THEY'RE WILD! THEY'RE WILD AS S# IT.

LAKE OF THE OZARKS IS FUN, WHY DO YOU LIKE IT SO MUCH? IT IS A FREEDOM FROM REALITY, IT'S TIME TO GET WASTED. UM, I LIKE IT BECAUSE IT HAS BEAUTIFUL SCENERY AND VERY MANY (LAUGHS) I ALSO LIKE IT BECAUSE THERE IS VERY MANY PEOPLE THAT ARE THERE'S A LOT OF PEOPLE GOING OUT PARTYING.

GET LOADED DOWN IN HORNEY TOAD. WHAT DO WE HAVE HERE 3 STORIES OF JUST CRAZINESS, ACTUALLY IT'S 4 STORIES THE NIGHT CLUB IS A TWO LEVEL NIGHT CLUB, WE GOT ABOUT 30,000 SQUARE FEET. WE'VE GOT 2 BANDS GOING ON TONIGHT PLUS THE NIGHT CLUB HAS A GREAT D.J. UP THERE. YOU GUYS COULD JUST DRIVE A BOAT TO THIS PLACE. THIS CLUB IS ABSOLUTELY SICK. IT'S SO FUN. I LOVE IT. NICE HAT YOU HAVE ON. HAT? YEAH. SERIOUSLY IT'S CUTE. HEY I APPRECIATE IT. THIS IS ALL FUN FOR US BECAUSE WE JUST DISCOVERED THIS PLACE, I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW THIS EXISTED IN MISSOURI. OH YEAH EVERYBODY SAYS THAT, YOU KNOW IT'S LIKE THE LAST FRONTIER DOWN HERE. YOU KNOW THEY CALL THIS KIND OF THE MIDWEST COAST. HORNEY TOAD GET LOADED HAVING A GOOD TIME AS USUAL, LAKE OF THE OZARKS. PEACE OUT. ARE YOU GUYS GOING TO ANOTHER PLACE NOW OR IS THIS IT FOR THE NIGHT? NO. WE HAD TOO MUCH FUN HERE, WE CAN'T GO ANYWHERE ELSE. WHEN YOU LOOK BACK AT THAT CLUB, LOOK AT THAT THING. I THINK IT SPENT TOO MUCH MONEY AND I HAD A LOT OF PEOPLE PUSH ME. BUT OTHER THAN THAT, IT WAS A FANTASTIC TIME. IF YOU'RE A SEXY WOMAN AND YOU COME TO THE LAKE, DO YOU MAKE A LOT OF FRIENDS? FRIENDS ARE VERY EASY TO MAKE HERE. WHAT UP? WHAT UP?

YOU GUYS HAVE A BOAT? WE DO. WHERE'S IT AT? RIGHT ON THE OTHER SIDE. EVERYBODY HAS A BOAT DOWN HERE. WHY ARE YOU HIDING? BECAUSE I'M SHY.

TELL ME ABOUT MISSOURI, WHY SHOULD PEOPLE COME HERE? CAUSE IT'S KICK ASS, WHERE YOU CAN F# # K ALL BITCHES.

I ACTUALLY SUNK A BOAT TODAY AND I GOT THROWN IN JAIL FOR BWI. I GIVE THIS A F# # # ING GOD DAMN. GOSH AND DAMN LOOK AT THAT MAN. CAN YOU JUST TELL THEM HOW YOU SUNK THE BOAT? WELL, WE HAD 13 PEOPLE ON A PONTOON BOAT. AND A CARVER CAME BY GOING LIKE THIS AND THE WAVE, WE JUST KIND OF WENT INTO IT AND WENT (MAKES NOISE) SO, I GOT MY SNORKEL GEAR OUT AND MISSOURI, HEY MISSOURI KNOWS HOW IT'S DONE. YOU HAD TO GO TO JAIL FOR THAT? WHY DID YOU HAVE TO GO TO JAIL? OH BABY WHEN YOU DRINK AND DRIVE A BOAT THEY LIKE THROW YOU IN JAIL I GUESS. AHHHHH

YOU GUYS BEEN OUT TO PARTY COVE. I DIDN'T MAKE IT OUT TODAY, SHE DID. HEY KANSAS CITY REPRESENTING IN THIS MOTHER F# # KER RIGHT NOW. HOW COME I HAVEN'T HEARD OF THIS PLACE UNTIL NOW? YOU HAVEN'T HEARD OF THIS PLACE? BECAUSE IT'S IN THE MIDWEST. (ALL TALKING) PARTY COVE? HOW WAS THAT? IT WAS SICK. F# # K YEAH. YOU LOVIN LIFE. PARTY COVE IS THE SPOT. WHAT'S THE CRAZIEST THING YOU'VE SEEN IN THIS PLACE? I'VE SEEN THE BIGGEST TITS ON THE STAGE GETTING DOWN, IT'S GOING DOWN IN THE CAGE. WHAT I WANT TO KNOW IS HOW COME I HADN'T EVEN HEARD OF THIS LAKE OF THE OZARKS. THIS IS THE BEST KEPT SECRET. WHERE YOU FROM? WELL I LIVE IN CALIFORNIA. NO WONDER IT'S A MISSOURI THING. THROW ME THAT GRILL. YEAH WE STUNNED EM IN THIS MOTHER F# # KER. FOR REAL S# IT. Y'ALL KNOW HOW WE DO. WE'RE GETTING MARRIED AREN'T WE? YES. SATURDAY. YOU GUYS TALK TO ME CAUSE QUITE FRANKLY WE'VE DONE CLUBS ALL OVER THE WORLD. I HAVEN'T SEEN ANYTHING COOLER THAN THIS WHERE YOU CAN JUST HANG OUT ON THE DOCK YOU KNOW YOU LOVE IT. THREE FLOORS OF MAYHEM GO OUT ON A BOAT RIDE. WHAT IS THE CRAZIEST THING YOU'VE SEEN INSIDE OF THAT? OH MY FAVORITE WERE STANDING THERE SMOKING A CLOVER AND THIS GUY COMES UP AND OUR WHOLE WEEKEND IT'S BEEN ABOUT GINERS. GINAS RIGHT.

AND ANYWAY SO HE COMES UP WITH A SHIRT AND IT SAYS I LOVE A GINA AND I JUST LOVED THAT SHIRT SO I WENT OUT THERE AND SAID I WANT THAT SHIRT. I'M NOT SURE WHAT JUST HAPPENED OVER THERE, DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA? NO. NOT REALLY. WE SAW SOME ORAL SEXUAL ACTIVITY GOING ON, ON THE SIDE OF A BOAT. (LAUGHS) SHE, SHE WAS ENJOYING IT SO. PARTY COVE A GUY WAS SHOWING HIS STUFF, WHATEVER BUT WHAT WAS HILARIOUS IS WHILE HE WAS DOIN IT HE PULLED DOWN HIS PANTS AND SLIPPED OFF THE F# # # ING BOAT. SQUIBBS DOWN THE SIDE OF THE BOAT. THIS IS ALL IN HIGH DEFINITION RIGHT NOW. ALL THROUGHOUT THE COUNTRY. SAY HELLO TO THE UNITED STATES. HI. WE HAD SOME FUN HERE, WE'RE ACTUALLY OUT OF TIME. THIS IS THE END OF OUR SHOW. SWEET. (ALL TALKING)

I DON'T KNOW. TALKING TO HOT PEOPLE. NO I'M HOPING SOME DAY I'LL FIGURE IT OUT.

RIGHT HERE, LOOK AT THIS.

WHAT AM I LOOKING AT? S# IT WHAT YOU SEE? HEY LOOK AT THIS. (VIBRATING NOISE) I'VE NEVER SEEN SO MANY FAKE TITTIES IN YOUR LIFE.

IF YOU WANT A BIG HAIRED WHITE GIRL, COME DOWN TO MISSOURI FOR REAL CUZ I'M GONNA LET Y'ALL KNOW HEY, HEY, HEY HEY BROTHERS I'M TRYING TO TELL ALL THE BROTHERS AROUND AMERICA MAN. I'M GONNA LET YOU ALL KNOW THE BIG ASS WHITE GIRLS ARE HERE.

I JUST DID 20 CHICKS INSIDE THE BATHROOM, ALL RIGHT. NICE! YES, YES WE'RE OUT OF TIME HERE MAN, WAS THIS A SHOW OR WHAT? YEAH THIS IS GREAT BROTHER.