Art Mann Presents...

Episode Number: 203

Episode Title: The Gasparilla Pirate Festival

Description: Travel with us to Tampa, Florida as thousands of pirates invade the city for some merriment and mayhem.

Transcript:

Welcome to sunny Florida

Oh, welcome to the show, say hello to Tampa. I also want to introduce you to somebody else, the Gasparilla Pirate Fest. That is the only place where women down here are like 2-3 times and everyone says the same thing. Ah dude what are you doing? You have to come back for the Gasparilla Fest. We did, and its right here. Oh thank you. We rock here in Tampa.

Oh I love you, my purple beads. That is what this is all about is the beads. Huh I won't take my top off, I promise. Welcome to Gasparilla 2006 baby.

The center of this whole thing is the arrival of a giant Pirate Ship, right, but we cant see that from here, well we could but that is not the way to do it. We're going to go see if we can make friends with somebody, get on a boat and go out there and escort the thing coming in.

Get a bunch of people some boats and some water and you just cant help it. It just gets crazy every time, am I right? We've learned that if we have learned anything off of this show, we have learned, look, take a look over here, Exhibit A.

So what we are trying to do is the pirate ship. There are about 50 million boats doing the same thing.

Uh oh, Uh oh

Now there's that pirate ship

I do love this country. Grab your boat, grab some firearms and bunch of beads, alcohol, lets just all go in the water at the same time and party.

Like I told you guys earlier in the show this is just step one of this party. We're going to go on land now and talk with some of those people. We'll be right back.

We show up at stuff like this. We have no clue what is going on, right. I know, I've seen your show. Tell me what the hell happens now. You see the parade, you keep drinking, and then we cruise through the parade and pass out beads. I have seen you at Mardi Gras. You know what happens with beads. I have seen the beads, yeah. We have come to the right place my pirate friend. You hear that, they heard that little piece. We'll be right back with this crazy parade and beads. Is that the end there?

You see what just happened was, welcome back by the way, we followed those boats down this canal river and you see all the pirates are coming ashore. You get it. Normal city right here, Tampa, Pirates come to shore, mayhem. Hello pirates.

Now what happens I guess is this thing comes to land with a huge pirate parade. As you can see there is about 5-1/2 million people getting ready to watch it and from what I'm told, what my recon tells me, is that this thing is not ready to be televised. That is what they told me. All right, that's a quote. Thank you. Let's take a look. Gasparilla is a wonderful, it's a Tampa tradition. Ho take fun and there are pirates. They come in and they invade Tampa. They take over the city. Then we can drink and we can party and have a good time.

What the hell is going on here?. (woman giggling)

I'm feeling What are you doing? Drinkin beer. When did you start? Uh 10 o'clock in the morning.

It's my first Gasparilla. I just want to let you know that. And it looks like your doin it. That's right Show the people at home what you have. Yeah!!!!!!!

How long has this been going? It has been going on for 100 years. Right. Here in Tampa and it's basically one big party. How long is the parade. The parade is about 7 miles. Holy cow. And I heard there is like 120 floats or something like that. Yes.

It's all about the beads, isn't it? It is. It's all about the beads.

Your brought your snake to the parade. Yes sir. You know what? Pirates love snakes. They hate parrots. This is an albino Burmese. He is about 5 feet. This is a regular Burmese about 11 feet. Are you all right with hanging out next to the snakes? Right, I love the snakes, they're so nice. Hey, he wants to hold the snake. No, I'll be holding it funny.

I have been here for over 7 years so I know its been going on for that long. Very nice.

You know what I learned real fast. It is not a great idea having something that they want around your neck when you get too close to them. Uh why do you think we stand in the middle of the road. What is the craziest group? Oh, I don't want to go on record with that.

The Gasparilla parade is why we are the Tampa Bay Buccaneers. I got to thank you guys. It is one thing to come to the Gasparilla thing to do the parade but to be on the float is pretty cool. Hey, look what I was just presented with. Hello honorary Crew of Ybor member.

What are you guys? We are the Crew of Ybor. We are preserving the historic district of the Ybor city of Tampa which was established in the early 1900s. You like a man with a lot of beads? The beads is what Gasparilla is all about.

See that is what Ybor City is all about. What are we doing now? We're going to this field area, right? Well, were going to go over the Platte Street Bridge into downtown Tampa.

Oh, nice. bead the camera man up. Help me out, on this show I don't know a lot of stuff. We just roll into town and we figure it out. What is this crazy canal that we arrived on. This is the Hillsborough River and people love to come out here on their boats to enjoy Gasparilla. We came in on that with the pirate ship. It was nuts. Oh yeah, the pirate ship picks up the pirates over at the Tampa Yacht Club and then the come over here. They disbarge and then they take a bus over to the beginning of the parade.

What up? Now I don't mean to brag but this is pretty good access so we can get on a float. We can march in the parade essentially. Gasparilla baby.Whooooo.

Wholy crap!

Tell me about the parade. Do you know any history about this thing? Ah, not really. We come every year though. We know that much. I'm just having fun. Actually you know Ford started it. They started it, Ford and they have it every year.

Hey, I am your biggest fan. I love you. First of all, I have never seen a longer parade. Awww. How long is gonna go, it's like 4 hours. It's like 5 hours. 120 floats. Oh, it's beautiful, beautiful, beautiful. (both talking indiscernible). All the boobs, all the butt. You can't beat it. Here we go, ohhh. Holy cow. Do you know here? No. You just started swapping some tongue with a random. That is a great hat. That is an official roach, an Indian roach from the Sonoka Tribe. Did you see my hang low on this one. Yeah. You got some long ones there.

You need some beads here, a couple silvers. I know the beads are the answer. There we go. Now this guys got beads. Welcome to Tampa buddy. Were you guys just walk in the Parade. Yeah we did. How many miles?. A mile and a half. At least. And did we drink to get through the parade. No. We drink at the start and drink to the end. Is that part of a costume or is that the real tooth? This, That is awesome. Semi tooth back in Mexico in 1982. How many hours will we have been, ah, ya know, drinking. I pick him up at 6:45 in the morning so we start at about 7:15. 15 hours. So here is what I am thinking my friend. We got this parade covered. We did it. Were still close to Ybor City. We are. Shouldn't we just go down there tonight. I mean doesn't that complete the show. You know, listen Ybor City is a good time. All right here is my deal. Nothing against this parade, it's fantastic but what the hell kind of TV show does just the parade. So were down here. Let's go find some drunk people. Right after the break.

This looks pretty good. Tell them where we are you guys. This is your stage. We are in Ybor City Tampa Florida. Ybor City Ybor City whoooo.

This was just handed to me. You guys want that. Our school is James Madison University. It is 71% female. JMU, I just want to say JMU. You figure, you know, at least 30% of the population is slutty girls.

Not a bad show so far right. What was missing, the whole first part of the show there was something missing, right? Yeah. Hot chicks. Ah, thank you. I'm just not hot enough for you guys, so I brought them in to help me out and I appreciate it. Why don't you introduce yourselves and say high to my TV friends out there. You first. My name is Lisa and I'm from here in Tampa Florida. My name is Shana and I'm originally from Jersey and I'm here from Jacksonville, Florida. And your both Sofie girls if you look at the shirts. From a distance it looks odd because someone is pointing at your chest. Look at that. Are you guys going to help me kind of check out Ybor City, right. Oh, definitely. All right we'll talk, are you good at talking to people that might be having a good time, translation drunk. Uh, yeah. Yeah. Were going to try it. You girls We can handle them. We have the guns. Oh yeah, well you, key word is Jersey. I'm Jersey right here. She's got this covered. All right let's find some people around here. What kind of crazy stuff goes on because I have no idea. It's new to me too. I was just telling them this is my first time here in Ybor City. The parade was nuts. The parade was crazy. What clubs would recommend we go to?. The amphitheater.

(Indiscernible) Any what? Some titties man. Oh, titties. Nah, we got to keep looking. I think this blue paint will attract those titties, wont they. Oh yeah, hell yeah it will. People often ask us where those are and I really don't know, I don't know what to say right? I love this guys shirt though. It is very distracting. I know.

All I'm saying is if you ain't working Tampa, Tampa M, Texas is represented. Let's get everybody. All right. Are you going to f# # # # # # card me. Yeah. What's up dude? Hey talk to us. You put crazy people from TV and you fooled the rest of the people. None of them are

Yeah, this looks like a fun job I have. Yeah, you walk around talking to women, you know get drunk. Here is your training. You talk about women. You're going to talk to a passed out dude on the bench. Passed out dude on the bench. What do you got to say? What do you got to say? I say that Ybor is a fine, fine city. Did you see those girls over there? Yeah. You know that will wake up anybody, those girls. It will.

I'll tell you I can stay on the streets all night because I love talking to people. Oh, definitely. But we have to hit some clubs, right? Yeah. Were going to jam in Hido and I have a feeling that two hot girls make it easy to get in. Yeah I think it will Yeah. Definitely can help Definitely can help. Let's do it. Time for a little fast motion. Watch this.

Did I hear you are our kind of people because you have a great hat. Thank you. It happens. It happens. It's a nightclub. You have some talent. What's up Art. Yeah. I want to go inside and tell me about your place we are about to enter. All right our nightclub Hido is one of the oldest bars in town. It is the original party bar of Ybor City. We got girls dancing on the bar. We have tons of people inside. You guys come check it out, have a good time. Uh, either of you have the guts to get on that bar. I do. I will get up on that bar.

DJ Now right now is ladies on that bar. Tell them what happened. I was up there dancing trying to have a good time and be goofy, my heel got caught in a crack and I almost fell to my death. Now we have to find that shy one and we're going to go to the next club. Yeah, we go to get her out here and get her on camera. Let's go. I'm ready.

This next place is because I cant explain it once we go inside there because they have like a 3 million dollar sound system. It is called Amphitheater. Okay. I have been there before. I'll give you a little scoop on this. The dance floor rotates and CO2 machines that can cool the place 20 degrees. More oxygen for Shana. Definitely. I know this isn't easy. Give me one swimsuit pose right here even though I know your not wearing a swimsuit. Give me the hardest pose. (Art laughing). Give them just one. Give them that one. Just show them that one. You can do it.

Now what does it feel like to once you get into the pirate outfit. It feels bad, huh. It is fabulous. It is art. You have to scrub the deck. I love Gasparilla.

Hey booby Booby Look at this. Tampa is the place to be tonight baby, yeah. Have a beer. I barely even drink but I like I gotta get something. Red Bull and vodka. What do you think about that. Yeah, Oh. She keeps grabbin my ass. You have a nice one. God bless you. What do you think of this place?. I think this place is kickin. It is really cool, a lot of fun. I cant hear anything.

Aye, Aye, Aye This is it right here. Hey

Were almost done with your show here. Quite the show. What is the show?. We did a whole special on the Gasparilla Festival my gorgeous friend. All right I was a little, hung over last night and I didn't wake up until maybe like 1 pm. Motor boating sons of b# # # # # # s. Say it. Say what? Motor boating sons of b# # # # # # s. Say what? Motor boating sons of b# # # # # s. Just do it. I say yeah Tampa wahaaaaaa You want to explain that to everybody. I see that move a lot. This is rock on. It is sexy to rock on. With the tongue in there?

Yeah.

Very nice. Because if you do the travel stuff, Tampa goes til 3 doesn't it. Yeah. That's nice. Huh? Yeah. Really good. Her tits go 24/7 though. Oh well now what is that again? Her tits go 24/7. That might be the quote of the show. Sweet. Congratulations. Yeah. We want to thank you for that quote. That was brilliant. Oh I want to thank myself. I take all the credit.

This was fun to have you guys kind of co-host this edition for the end of the show here but I think that thing, that is a whole half-hour special. How did you get all these beads, did you flash some people? I don't know if I can say c# # k. No, no, no no. This is my friend Lisa. How ya doin? Where are you from? Your name. Joe. Joe? I'm wanna ooop you. Do you like cheese? I love the cheese. What kind of cheese do you like? Provolone. Provolone, good. We got a cheese lover on our hands. Provolone. Now how much have you had to drink tonight? Ahhh I only had a couple but more than in my entire life right now. How much have you had to drink tonight? Uhhh too much. Are you drunk? No. Ahhh I don't know about that. Hey, where's that accent from? Sweden. How would you say a hammered in your native tongue. How do you say f# # # # d up in Sweden. Hamburgers. I didn't say hamburgers. What is this like candid camera. Nothing hidden about that thing. Where's the hidden camera. Where? That is Glen doing security. Do you feel safe with Glen watching your back? Right? Yes. But uh he has been watching your back all night. Nice Uh, have you seen what Shana can do? Uh, I think I do see it over there. Let's check it out one more time. Shana can touch her breasts with her heel. Shana I think it is a perfect time for that. Oh my God. Hey I appreciate you guys joining me for this uh, the end of the show. I think this is the most attractive part of the show easily. Right here. Hey. Lisa and I were talking and I think maybe the heels to the breasts would be a good way to go out. Don't you think? Yeah. Heels to the what? You mean what I did. You know. You know what thing it was. Oh, oh, oh that. Okay, I didn't know what we were talking about here. Nice. Oops you just caused an accident. That was an accident causing move. Look at that. Bye. Bye-bye thank you. You guys are wrapped up. Gotta wrap it up. You guys are wrapped up.

I think we brought them a pretty good show, didn't we. I think we did, The Amphitheater, awesome. In the Gasparilla Festival, we came on strong in the this last spot. Absolutely. I had some second co-hosts. I end on you. That is a good way to end the show. It is a good ending. Happy ending at The Amphitheater.

Yes. That guy is funny. Thanks for watching you guys. I want to tell them drop us an email. We came to this thing because a guy emailed us and told us we had to do it, so thanks to him. Were outta here. Thank you very much.

All right here we go. Hi my name is Humpert. Back up. I am just a little bit drunk but I'm having fun. The thing is I love all the (indiscernible) and (indiscernible) is the Sweden King. He is a lovely dude. Hey did you know you have butt cracking hanging out the back? Right? What? Your butt crack is hanging out.

Remember crack kills. You know I'm in heaven right now. See the credits for all the people who work on this show. Yeah. See them all. I see them everywhere.

Work it, work it.

Come on check out my triceps. Check it out right there. That is what I am doing right now. Yeah. This muscle right here.